From Fear to Freedom: The Entrepreneurial Journey of Kalila coaching follow-up

Speaker 2: 1:08

Welcome to the Undiscovered Entrepreneur, the podcast where brand new entrepreneurs come to life and could quite possibly be discovered. Join me, DJ Scoob and the rest of the Scoob believers as we help these new businesses become a reality. And now away we go. We now join DJ Scoob and the second coaching of Kalila already in progress. I've been talking to you, if you haven't noticed. I have.

Speaker 3: 1:51

I really appreciate your comment.

Speaker 2: 1:52

Yeah, absolutely, and I really like everything that I've seen up to this point. You're really kind of pushing yourself to get out there a little more often from when we talked last, and I really, really like that. So tell me what's been happening with you since we talked last. I have a few questions for you, but I want to talk about you first.

Speaker 3: 2:13

Sure, first of all, thank you. It speaking with you the first time really helps solidify so much in my head of what I sort of was had floating around, what I was talking to my husband about, what I had kept hearing for months and years of saying, like you should be doing this and I'm like, okay, I know, but how, I don't know how to do that. So it was really helpful to find somebody like you, who I've never met You've only ever seen my stuff on Facebook or on Instagram and you, coming at this from a different perspective, saying, no, they're all right, like, listen to them. So I really, really want to thank you for that. But since we talked, it definitely took me another few weeks to still say, okay, so where do I go from here? People have told me for years I should start a podcast and I've never really understood what I had to say until I really delved into this pregnancy loss idea and I, after experiencing it, after being able to really empathize with people, it's been something that I want to talk about more. I want people to find this space to be able to say, oh my gosh, somebody else is going through exactly what I'm going through. Oh my gosh, I can't believe that I've kept this inside for so long and yet all these other women know exactly what I'm feeling. So I realized that by starting a podcast, by interviewing people to be able to really hear their stories, and not just hear the stories of loss, but really delve into how they decided that they were going to thrive on the other side of loss Because I was just talking to somebody a few minutes ago and I said everybody is affected by loss in some way, shape or form, whether it's pregnancy loss or it's death from a different scenario. And yet you have to find a way to continue living. You're still here, and I want to hear those stories of how that person went from losing a child, losing a baby, losing a pregnancy, to then coming into their own and saying, okay, but I'm still here, my husband is still here, my other children, very well, could still be here. What happens now? And how do I do that? And so that's what the podcast is going to start to be about I have to start setting up my interview dates. I already made my trailer and I made my artwork for it and I got brave and I posted it. So it was definitely a moment of like I patted myself on the back and I got really great feedback from it and now I just really have to figure out and your idea of taking those post-it notes and putting them on my wall to understand what each episode is going to be about has been floating around to say, okay, where do I want to start and what's the trajectory of where I want to go.

Speaker 2: 5:12

Good, that's amazing. So congratulations, that's great. That's exactly what I want to hear. I want to hear movement. I want to hear you actually doing something, moving forward into the ideas and thoughts that you've had about you know how do I do this, how do I go about this, what's the next step I'm going to take? So I commend you on that. That's amazing. Congratulations, that's fantastic.

Speaker 3: 5:32

Thank you.

Speaker 2: 5:33

So it takes me back to the story that you told me in our first session about the woman that came to you in the booth and she wanted to, you know, had to tell somebody about what was going on, and those are the kind of people that you want stories about, you know. So that kind of goes around in my head when I think about what you're saying here. So that's good. So I mean, what else have you done? I mean, we got a couple of things we talked about in the last, in our last sessions, or anything else that you know you've been working on.

Speaker 3: 6:02

Yes, so I actually met with a friend of mine who's helping me put together a course. I'm going to probably do two different courses One's going to be an eight week course and one's going to be kind of a five day boot camp. For I think eight weeks is really going to be geared more towards people who have just experienced a pregnancy loss and are trying to figure out how to live their lives, going over what could be triggers, going over how to deal with the anxiety, going over breathing techniques and things that helped me a lot. And coming at it from a non-therapist perspective. To say I am here to offer advice, I'm here to offer an ear to listen to, I'm here to offer something that I've been through that I know has helped, and, if you need more help, to then guide the people in the right direction. To say, okay, this is where a therapist needs to come in. So that's the eight week course. And then I think I was working on figuring out the five day course. To say, okay, this could be a boot camp, that is, a once a day meeting for 30 to 45 minutes for somebody who either just needs a few extra pick me up or needs somebody to talk to or needs to be able to just hear from other people that have been through the same situation, whether it was five years ago or 20 years ago, and they still have this inside of them that they've never told anybody or that they've never been able to talk about. So those are the two courses I'm working on. And then my friends and I were also discussing and this is very far in the future, but to discuss a way to figure out some sort of retreat, to say, for lost parents and it's not just for lost moms, because this does affect both people to say maybe we could try and do a weekend retreat of getting people together, hearing from therapists, hearing from emotional healers, doing some sort of spot treatment, doing some sort of relaxation day, things like that. So that's sort of in the very early stages of planning.

Speaker 2: 8:02

And that's a. That's a fantastic idea, and I don't like to focus on the money, but that is actually a good way to be able to put something together which will be a high ticket item for you later on, so that's fantastic.

Speaker 3: 8:16

And it's nothing like I go ahead.

Speaker 2: 8:20

Oh, there's nothing wrong with looking into the future. That that far.

Speaker 3: 8:25

Right and I think part of me because I was coming at it from this perspective of people who have gone through loss, have gone also through fertility treatment, because I was coming at it from surrogates point of view. And when I spoke to another friend of mine and she said I went through fertility treatments but not very many and I never use a surrogate, I still benefit from something like this. I would gladly pay X amount of dollars for whatever services you have to offer. And it made me reframe how I was then thinking about it, because I kept thinking, oh my gosh, intended parents are coming at this already, spending thousands of thousands, sometimes hundreds of thousands of dollars on egg retrieval and on IVF and then on finding a surrogate and all those sorts of complications, whereas people who have a pregnancy loss very often are not in that same category. They've literally had a pregnancy loss and don't know what to do.

Speaker 2: 9:22

Good, good, keep all that in mind as you're moving along, because you're going the right way. I mean, it's definitely niche down to where you can. You know it's somebody that you can tell one specific person that you could talk to, that has one specific experience. So that's good. That's exactly what you want to have. You don't want to be too broad. You want to narrow it down to people that you know you talk to, and I think more people will be more likely to talk to somebody who's experienced these things, rather than a therapist or something like that who just read about it in a book Right, you know. So, like instead of somebody like that, even though technically we're not therapists quote, quote, therapists we are people that's experienced these things firsthand, that we know what we've gone through and what the emotions are and what the processes are healing and things like that. So I think you're really in the right direction on there. Let's keep an eye on that retreat. I actually have a few questions for you about that later on. Sure, I really like that idea. That's a fantastic idea. So another thing when we talked last to we're talking about speaking engagements and you had something going along the lines of I think was a demo that you're putting together or something like that. Did you actually do that?

Speaker 3: 10:39

So I ended up being able to record a speech that I did. That had nothing to do with pregnancy loss and I'm using pits of it to create my demo reel. But I also ended up getting my portraits redone, so I now have way more material from my website. So I still don't have my full demo reel. However, this week I am starting the speaker class that I signed up for all the way in May, I know, finally, so I know that part of that is going to also be helping to figure out how to put that demo reel together and make it look professional. So I'm not overwhelmed with saying, ok, well, I'm starting this podcast and I'm doing this and I have to figure out how to get a demo reel together and they can actually help me and sit down and say, ok, this is what we need from you, this is the types of reels that we need, this is the types of pictures that we need. This is how we need you doing a voiceover. So, fortunately, the class is finally starting and I'll be able to really concentrate on that.

Speaker 2: 11:40

Fantastic. Keep me posted on how that goes for you. I'd really like to hear your progress in the class. Sure. Yeah, that'd be amazing. So did you actually get to that point where you were able to speak in front of three to five people in front of them, like that?

Speaker 3: 11:54

Excuse me. Yes, I did Like I said, it wasn't specifically on pregnancy loss, but I did have to, and that's the reason why I got into speaking in the first place is because every time we go somewhere whether it's in a conference, or whether it's for an event or whatever it is all of my friends are always like oh, khalila will get up and speak, like she could put them together or whatever in a few minutes, doesn't matter. And so I had to get a group of friends together for an event that I had planned very last minute, and so I did prepare something for that and I spoke in front of them. So that's when I ended up recording, which I have to see. If I can use bits and pieces of that, that's OK. I'm getting over a cold.

Speaker 2: 12:41

So tell me about that experience. Tell me about the experience speaking up in front of people. How is that different than before?

Speaker 3: 12:49

I am. How is it different? I think I'm just more confident that people want to listen. I think before even one-on-one, I very distinctly remember thinking I'm telling a story and I don't know if the person wants to hear all those little details, Whereas as a speaker, it's really the details that make up the experience to then be able to teach the lesson. And so it's one thing when you have an engaged audience saying wow, I want to hear, more than to saying one-on-one with somebody who might be looking off into the distance or might be going to see who else is in the room that you're at, or whatever. It might be that they're not always fully focused on you. So I think my mindset has shifted and my confidence level has shifted in that respect.

Speaker 2: 13:50

So was it as bad as you thought it was going to be?

Speaker 3: 13:53

No, of course not. I love speaking.

Speaker 2: 13:58

That's great, that's good to hear. I really wanted to go through that, you know, kind of relive that experience with you so you realize that it's really not. You know, it's not as scary as you're really making it out to be. You know, and that was one of the conversation points that we had in our first session was was the fear of being able to do that. But that fear is what's actually going to lead you into new things and to getting out of your comfort zone and that kind of thing and telling stories that's that's going to be one of your main points when you are speaking is telling a really good story that connects to what you're actually trying to get across to the audience. Right. So that's fantastic.

Speaker 3: 14:36

There's still in the back of my head. It's always going to be harder to speak in front of a small group of people as opposed to a large auditorium. Something about that intimacy is definitely like oh my gosh, should they get to pay attention to what I'm saying? Are they going to be interested in what I'm saying? Where is a whole auditorium of people? I know I'm not going to reach every single person. That's there and that's okay because, as a friend of mine says, I'm not everyone's person and that's okay, but it's it's. You know the ratios. If you're in a large auditorium full of people, you'll have a lot more people who will say, oh, she's the person I want to listen to, as opposed to a small, intimate group.

Speaker 2: 15:14

Right, right. I'm glad you were actually able to overcome that, and the more times you actually do it, it's just going to get better and better. You're always going to have that little nervous in the back of your head. That's normal. I'm sure you couldn't understand that, and that's going to be for everybody Me, you, the best speaker in the universe right now. He's always going to have that little nervousness in the back. That's okay, but I'm really glad you're able to overcome that the way you did. So that's really good stuff.

Speaker 3: 15:42

Thank you.

Speaker 2: 15:43

Yeah, so another thing we talked about was increasing your getting your word out. I think that was the one of the first things we actually talked about in our last session, and I see you increasing your, your posting on Facebook and things like that and some other things. So have you actually done anything else besides that to get your word?

Speaker 3: 16:02

out. I've really concentrated on understanding how the algorithms work and have been learning from somebody who increased her own following from just a few hundred people to thousands of people. So I've been trying to sort of emulate what she's been doing, and a lot of it has to do with just understanding how the programs work. You know, if you're never on Instagram, then the one time you post is not really going to do much to the algorithm, but if you comment on other people's stuff and when you really reach out to people it makes a big difference. So what I've been doing more of is commenting on people videos on on other accounts that either have to do with things that I'm talking about, but trying to make that one-on-one connection which sometimes seems so impossible. On the social media aspect of it, that's where it's the exact opposite, with the intimacy part. You know, one-on-one becomes very easy to create a connection, but when you're in this world of social media, all of a sudden, it's well, there's billions of people on social media, so what do I have to say that stands out? And creating that connection, I think, is really where I know I can thrive. I love talking to people, I love getting to know people, I love understanding where they are coming from. So not just posting, but DMing and then commenting on other people's stuff is is a huge help, and it really does then create this. Oh wait a minute. She's talking about something that I want to hear about, so let me see what she what else she has to say.

Speaker 2: 17:40

And, and that's going to create super fans for you. That's that one-on-one connection to people that are actually reaching out to you and say I want to hear about more of what you have to say. One thing that I tend to do, especially on my Twitter, slash X, whatever it is now is anybody that follows me. I will actually DM them, say thank you for following me, and I've done that over a thousand times at this point because I don't miss a point. Every follower that I have, I reach out to them and say thank you for following me. Is there anything I could do to help you? And I've actually got some great connections from people saying yeah, you know, can you listen to my podcast real quick so I can get an idea? Oh, sure, and I'll listen to it. And then say, oh, you know what you can do. This or this is you know. Then you start getting that connection. You start actually responding. They realize that you're somebody, that that is actually going to talk to them, not just be the one to follow. You know that they get moving on to the next one, right?

Speaker 3: 18:36

So it's funny because it's one of those where, like when you, when you start to follow somebody that you admire and they do it to you and you're like, oh my gosh, they wrote back, and then you're like, wait, I'm person for someone else. Yeah, believe it or not. It's a definite like shift that you I just don't think that way sometimes.

Speaker 2: 18:59

Yeah, you never know what kind of connections you're gonna actually make. So my, my virtual mentor, pat Flynn, I actually got into a conference accidentally, got into a conversation with him about kids, and then he followed me and I was like I was not expecting that at all. I was like so obviously I followed him back and said, hey, thanks for the follow. The whole account it goes. We had a great conversation about our kids. Why wouldn't I follow you? So I was like, ah, cool, you never know who you're going to be able to reach out to you, especially when it comes to those intimate conversations. You have those reach outs that you have. So keep doing what you're doing there. That's great. You might want to, if it helps you out at all, maybe finding some automations to reach out to people so you can do constant posting, like you were talking about. The more posting you do helps the algorithms and that kind of thing. I actually have a, an automation that does that for me. I could introduce you to if you'd like. Okay, which really helps me with getting my word out there a little more consistently. I've noticed a lot more profile visits since I started doing that, a lot more likes and follows and that kind of thing. So okay.

Speaker 3: 20:12

I also started a mailing list, which I was always ready to do because I I know for myself. I see emails come in and I'm like okay, next, next, next, it's spam and this goes to 500 people, this goes to 10,000 people like I, whatever. So my mailing list is growing, but it's one where my email is definitely something that I would open. It's a quick note to say hi, it's a quick picture to see, like, okay, you know, I had a the flu last week. So this week, when I sent it out on Friday, it was my week flew by because I was sleeping for two days. How was your week? Please email me back. So it's definitely one where I've I've been trying really hard to get that weekly email out.

Speaker 2: 21:02

So how many email, how many email subscribers do you actually have right now? Do you think?

Speaker 3: 21:09

Right now it's just under a hundred, but I'm working on growing that.

Speaker 2: 21:12

Good, good, that's actually good. You actually have a better start than me at this point.

Speaker 3: 21:17

Oh, wow.

Speaker 2: 21:20

It's something that's really important to do, but it's just one of those things where I'm kind of concentrating on the podcast more than pretty much anything else right now, but it is a vital thing to have as an email list that I'm actually working on myself.

Speaker 3: 21:35

Right now, too, I want to talk about and part of the podcast is also then saying like, hey, this episode just came out, so I know I'll have more content to be able to email people. And the thing I like specifically with the email list is that some of the people I'm not connected with on Facebook or Instagram or anything and some of the people are cousins who might not even be on those platforms but have had email for you know, 40 years or however long emails been out.

Speaker 2: 22:03

Yeah, yeah, I've had my email address for quite some time, Right. Another thing I want to talk about that we talked about before was you possibly coming out with a book? Do you remember that? Yes, how's that going?

Speaker 3: 22:20

I do. I don't think that I've got enough to hold to the sheer fact that I have these two classes right now that I'm doing with speaking and with podcasting, and the book pod that I have is a lifetime class. So I got it to the point of being able to put together a oh, it was a call, Like almost like a press release to be able to send out to agents and publicists and things like that, so that once I get that put together, I can then see if I can find someone like Schuster or Penguin or whoever it might be to say oh, this is a great story, we want to be able to pay you to write the rest of it. So I do have three full chapters written and I want to sort of put that on the back burner. It's not going away, but it's just not high yet.

Speaker 2: 23:12

That's okay. I might suggest maybe just putting like 15, 20 minutes aside every other day to maybe just kind of work on it just a little bit, even if it's only two or three sentences at a time. Right. I mean, even though it's on the back burner, it's not a high priority. Actually just doing a little bit at a time, even if it's only 15, 20 minutes at a time, eventually it will get done. It will take a lot longer, you know, obviously.

Speaker 3: 23:39

But at least it's not completely unfolded.

Speaker 2: 23:41

Yeah, and you're still kind of sort of working on it, because I think a book, especially in the subject that you're talking about in the book, is actually very vital. Thank you Okay. So I wouldn't necessarily stop doing it, but I would definitely put like 15, 20 minutes aside, just a time where you could just actually just work on it. Just a little bit Right, just a little bit, because you know that just a little bit of time's got a snowball over time into a finished product. Possibly, depending on you know how that works for you. Yeah, I actually finished interviewing. One of the things you said where you have a problem with in our last session was finding out how to self publish and that kind of thing. I don't know if you've done any research on that lately, but I just finished an interview with a lady named Eleanor who has written two books. Both of them are self published and she's doing very well with them. If you want, I can have you know, I can give you her email address or, if you want to just reach out to her and say, hey, how did you do that? She's really nice and she's very strong minded and I think she'd be a quiet to help to you and I could send you. I'll send that to you a little bit later on, if you want.

Speaker 3: 24:58

Sure, thank you.

Speaker 2: 25:00

That way you can get that information you need or just say hey, you know how did you do it, and just kind of pick her brain a little bit.

Speaker 3: 25:05

Yeah, that would be great.

Speaker 2: 25:07

If you want to listen to her interview on my podcast, I think it was just two episodes ago, so okay, just to hear what she has to say. Okay perfect. All right. So what are you working on now? I mean, what's the next steps? I mean, what do you want to talk about?

Speaker 3: 25:25

The next step is setting up interviews. I was trying to figure out if Calendia was the best way to put in every 60 days to say, okay, this is my schedule and when I'm able to interview, and then reaching out. I know I already have four people that have said that they want to be interviewed, so just getting them on the calendar and starting that conversation. So I think, finding the best platform, like I was trying to figure out, do I need to have a Zoom membership or can I just use the normal 40 minute call? Is that not going to be enough? Is it better than just say, okay, we have unlimited amount of time and however long the conversation goes, the conversation goes, and then also saying, do I want to do it unedited or do I want to? Then, after the episode is recorded, say, okay, now I've got to sit down and figure out Do I cut out the ums, do I cut out the odds, do I cut out the blank spaces? You know, I know I was coughing at one point during our interview right now, so like what I have cut that out or what I leave it in things like that to just get down to the nitty gritty of it.

Speaker 2: 26:35

Okay, so interviewing, or getting interview, we is putting on a calendar and cutting out possibly editing and some editing tricks and things along those lines. What else are we doing? What else we got going on? Well, the speaker class starts on Wednesday.

Speaker 3: 26:52

So I guess, when I find out more about what they're going to start us really preparing with our keynotes and really understanding how to find the right people, I'll have more questions of that, of course, but those are the two concentrated aspects I'm working on right now. Okay, what else I don't know.

Speaker 2: 27:11

I feel like I'm at that point where I have a lot of questions.

Speaker 3: 27:16

I don't know. I feel like I'm at that point where I have the questions that I don't know what the questions are.

Speaker 2: 27:21

Sometimes the questions are harder than you know putting them together than the answers themselves.

Speaker 3: 27:25

You know it's great, because it's like you don't know what you don't know.

Speaker 2: 27:30

Yeah, okay, that's all right. I have a couple of things here too that we actually discussed a few minutes ago that I'm going to go ahead and add into that mix, if you don't mind. So Sure, do you have a calendar like a calendar Lee, or something like that set up for yourself. So when you do have interviews, it's very easy to kind of schedule them out.

Speaker 3: 27:53

I did set up a Calendary login and app account. So I do have that and I set up, I think, a calendar until the end of October. I tested it with a friend of mine to make sure it didn't hurt. I think I now need to also make sure that it sends out the Zoom link and I don't have to worry that I need to then come up with the Zoom link. So, just with my husband to figure out, okay, if I send you an interview link, how does this work from step A to B and walk me through the process. So I definitely need to do that and I know, with getting sick this past week, I was like, okay, I was going to do that this week, that's going on a calendar for next week. So that way I feel more confident that I can send it out and it's not going to be like shoot. Well, now what happens? How do I talk to the person?

Speaker 2: 28:44

Yeah, no, that's good. Yeah, set it up to Zoom. If you don't think your interview is going to be longer than 40 minutes, then just stick with the regular free premium Zoom.

Speaker 3: 28:56

I just don't know. For example, I got a phone call I mean it was a Facebook message phone call from somebody who I had recently connected with has nothing to do with the pregnancy world. Facebook just said, hey, you guys should be friends. So I thought, okay, why not? And she actually reached out to me before I had the chance to reach out to her and she said I looked over all of your stuff on your profile and I have a story for you. And she sent me a 25 minute message about a silver she had almost 20 years ago and it was one of those where I was like I am so honored that you felt like you could share that with me. Number one this has been something that she doesn't talk about with people. Number two and number three that's where my head goes to say well, I know how long my own story is and I don't want to limit people to say we only have 40 minutes to talk about this. This is something that I want you to feel comfortable in saying. You have as much time as you need.

Speaker 2: 29:59

So the way around that, because there is a workaround on that when your time gets close to, it'll actually give you like a five minute countdown. Before you went out of time In that five minute countdown, if you say, hey, I have to reset my zoom, I'm going to send you a second link and then you go on to that new link and then you start recording that on that second link.

Speaker 3: 30:22

So now you have to 45 minutes and then just edit it together.

Speaker 2: 30:24

And then just mush it together, exactly. So if you start doing this and you realize that you actually have to have that hour to forever, whatever it is you end up doing, right, that's when you could experiment with it and then realize, hey, I do need to pay this because it's going to be longer than I thought it was going to be. Okay. So when I started doing this podcast, I didn't need it. My highest one was 45 minutes. But then I ran into a gentleman named Cliff Ravenscraft who talked for an hour and 10 minutes and I actually ended up having to do that. So I was like, okay, so I could figure this out. But then I started doing the coachings. When I started doing the coachings, my coachings go almost two hours, usually. Right At that point I was like, okay, I need to have this. So experiment with it. Know that if you're checking things out and you have to mush them together more often than not, then you should probably think about getting it. Go ahead and upgrading the Zoom or whatever it is.

Speaker 3: 31:27

Okay. So, for now, sticking with 40 minutes is good, as long as I'm not doing that every single time and then saying oh, you're going over, you're going over, you're going over.

Speaker 2: 31:36

Right, because if you start doing that, that's when you'll realize it, you'll feel it and you'll get hey, this needs to be like this. So you know, don't worry too much about that, but there is a way, like I said, there's a way to bypass that and you should be okay. Just kind of keep an eye on that timing, okay. Okay, let's see Interviews. I need to. We talked a little bit about how to find a few guests. People are already reaching out to you, which is amazing. Capitalize on that as much as you can. And then, even if you, you could say, hey, do you know? And even with the guests that you do have coming on, you can ask them to hey, do you know anybody else that might be going through something like this? Because a lot of times, people in this situation will tend to group together because they're all going through the same thing. So it would be a good way to get some referrals onto your podcast if you say, hey, do you know anybody else that might do. Are you a part of a group? What is this group Maybe I could reach out to, maybe you can actually reach out to some of the groups yourself.

Speaker 3: 32:41

Definitely.

Speaker 2: 32:42

And say, hey, you know, I have this podcast. Does anybody want to talk about it?

Speaker 3: 32:47

Also, it was interesting because I first told my daughter about it. She's 12 now and she said well, you could interview me. And at first I thought, hmm, that might be a little bit difficult. I don't want people to think that I'm making light of the situation. She said, no, I went through it in a different way than you did. I was like you know what do we fix the kids? To tell you that you're thinking in the wrong direction. And she's right. She was just as affected by the pregnancy loss as I was. It was just in a different way. And to hear stories from the other people who are affected by it is also something I really want to understand, because I want to interview my daughter. I want to interview other people's family members. I've heard stories of you know cousins that are pregnant at the same time and one of them goes through a pregnancy loss and the other one keeps news on and has a healthy baby, and the one who lost the baby can't even bring herself to come to the baby shower or to the celebration of the first birthday or whatever it might be. But then you have this person who has this life that they're bringing into the world who doesn't. They don't know what to do. They feel horribly guilty, but at the same time they don't want to say that this child is now not worthwhile. Of course their child is worthwhile, but like, how do you reconcile that? So I want to talk to people who do. Maybe on the other side of pregnancy loss, that's a great.

Speaker 2: 34:13

You know that's a great idea. I really like that. I think you should go with that. I would actually go ahead and interview your 12, your daughter, even if it's just for practice, you know to, you know, get used to things, but find out if she actually does have a story, which it sounds like she does, and then you might get one interview but say but then, hey, do you have any family members that might blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, just like you're saying, and then get three or four interviews out of that one person, Right? So I think that's a great idea.

Speaker 3: 34:48

Yeah, definitely keep that in mind. It's also like I've heard. You know my parents were as affected by the pregnancy loss because it wasn't their grandchild. But the grandparents are also incredibly affected and I want to know what they went through, so even to talk to you. Know the grandparents, cousins, whatever to say. Tell me your side of it and tell me how you helped, either in your own mental state or with the person who became the survivor. What were you there to do for them? Good?

Speaker 2: 35:18

Good, good, good. So you got the juice is flowing. You're thinking I like it, I like it a lot. Yeah. Have you thought about maybe guessing on other podcasts to get your get the word out of what you're doing?

Speaker 3: 35:31

Yes, I actually. I had two that I had to reschedule because we had the hurricane in Florida that came in a few weeks ago. Yeah. And then I got sick, so I have one that I started the conversation with the person just to make sure that she understood what my story was, and she was the one that I was so excited to do the podcast with. And then the hurricane came and I was like I think we need to reschedule Because I don't want to have to worry about the power going out. See what would happen with you. Yeah, and so I have her. I have to get her back on the calendar. We have yet to find the deep, but I have started going on other people's podcasts and getting the word out in that respect as well.

Speaker 2: 36:09

Good, now, what kind of podcasts are these that you're getting onto?

Speaker 3: 36:14

Most of them are talking to the same general idea of resiliency and building inner strength and understanding. They'll be all come to table with some sort of trauma and figuring out how to then go through that trauma. They're coming at it from different sorts of survivor stories than I am.

Speaker 2: 36:34

OK, Do you know and this is more of a question than anything else Do you know if there's any other podcasts out there that talk about pregnancy loss?

Speaker 3: 36:48

There is definitely one. I interviewed with her a few weeks ago. I don't know when the podcast is coming out, but I did speak with her and there's. I looked it up. There's a handful. At most, none of them really caught my attention in terms of what they talk about. So a lot of podcasts really have to deal in terms of women have to deal with either pregnancy after loss which I am willing to talk about, but that's not my focus or, you know, going through a pregnancy or going through metapods, or you know those sorts of things. There's not really a lot to have to do specifically with pregnancy loss and then just being able to live afterwards.

Speaker 2: 37:29

Okay, so you're a pioneer in all this.

Speaker 3: 37:32

I think so.

Speaker 2: 37:33

I think you are. That's why I asked that question, because, like you know, I'm into podcasts and I look at different types of podcasts because I want to learn. You know I'm a constant learner and on that kind of thing, but I have yet to come across anybody yet that specifically talks about the niche that you're talking about. So, you know, take that within yourself, know that you, you this is something that could grow quickly and make you an authority and not scare you. But this is something that this is something I really think that you should really dig into when it comes to the podcast, and because I really think this is going to be something great for you.

Speaker 3: 38:14

Thank you. It's also nice because I think I can. I can pull on some of the people that I've also worked with. For example, here in Florida there's this woman who had a stillbirth just over 10 years ago. Her daughter and I actually share a birthday and her daughter lived only about a month before she passed away and she created this group called the Finley Project, and I've been working with her just in terms of meeting with her, throwing ideas to her and saying you know, was this something that you would have been able to use? Her foundation is phenomenal, but even just to be able to interview somebody like her and have her connections is also so incredibly important, and I'm really grateful for the people that I've been meeting along the way to know that this responsibility is important and necessary and I just feel honored that I'm the one that can do it.

Speaker 2: 39:05

And keep those connections close. You know, always keep your connections close. If you could find a way, have some kind of way to put, keep their names and addresses and the things that you've talked about, that thing together or things like that, later on these things will blossom into something great for you. Yeah. So keep that in mind. Another quick question about podcasting have you thought about? No, we talked a little bit about editing and that kind of thing. What are you going to use for editing at this point, or are you?

Speaker 3: 39:40

potentially garage bands, because it's the easiest. That has to do with Apple and everything I work on. I feel like I'm an Apple commercial when I walk around my husband's like I hate. Apple. And I'm like it's all I know I love it. So probably garage band, but I'm not 100% sure.

Speaker 2: 39:57

Okay, that's fine. I actually started out with the PC version of that which was Audacity, and that's basically.

Speaker 3: 40:05

I've heard about Audacity also.

Speaker 2: 40:07

It's basically. It's basically the PC version of GarageBand, so you know that's the right thing to do. Okay, when you go into your editing and listen for the m's and the a's and the wads and things like that, I understand wanting to take all of those out. I personally don't. The reason being is you still want to sound human. But if you take out too many ooms and ums and breath sounds and things like that, you kind of lose that human kind of feel. When I first started podcasting I did that. I took all of them out, I took all the breath sounds out and yeah, it sounded robotic but also take a ton of time.

Speaker 3: 40:45

Right. That's the other aspect of it where I'm like I appreciate the conversation. When I went back and listened to our conversation the first time I was like, wow, this is actually really helpful and I don't mind listening to the conversation. That is a natural flowing conversation. I think I'm just more concerned that if somebody gets tripped up on their words or if they forgot what they were going to say or something like that, that I have a way to just sort of work around that.

Speaker 2: 41:17

Yeah, so when it comes to pauses, I have like a two second rule. If it's any longer than two seconds then I'll go ahead and it shorted up or kind of take it out completely, but you still wanted to sound natural. So the other thing too is and I don't know how you feel about investing in software, but I invest in a software called Descript.

Speaker 3: 41:39

I've heard about Descript.

Speaker 2: 41:41

And it's been a game changer for me.

Speaker 3: 41:44

Oh, interesting.

Speaker 2: 41:45

It actually has a part in there where you can delete all the ums in one click. Wow. And the way it edits is very simple. Basically, it gives you a transcript and then if you delete the words in the transcript, then it deletes it out of the video and audio.

Speaker 3: 42:04

Is that also where people tend to take their show notes from?

Speaker 2: 42:09

Yeah.

Speaker 3: 42:10

That was the other aspect that I was trying to figure out in terms of saying, okay, if I put this all together, then what do I do with show notes? How do I write that, the description of it, like how long does that actually take?

Speaker 2: 42:25

So it could take a really long time or it could take a really short amount of time, depending on what you're wanting to do. So me personally, lately I've been using AI for my show notes.

Speaker 3: 42:39

Oh, interesting.

Speaker 2: 42:40

So what I do is I take my transcript, I throw it in the AI, then I just saw that I do a transcript for a podcast using these notes. Okay. And then it actually spits something out.

Speaker 3: 42:53

So it's five seconds later and there it is.

Speaker 2: 42:56

Yeah, exactly. Wow, I'm going to be honest with him. A terrible writer. I'm a horrible writer. It's probably one of my worst things, so being able to do that has been really a big game changer for me.

Speaker 3: 43:12

Okay and you just use like a chat, gpt or.

Speaker 2: 43:15

So lately I've been using Bing. Bing seems to be a lot more accurate and it has internet capability where a chat GPT and the other one that I use, cloud AI, is not internet capable. And the Google one is still kind of glitchy a little bit for me. Okay. So I've been using the Bing version. Okay. So, but the other thing is the server that I use Buzzsprout is the name of that and they actually just integrated AI into theirs as well too, so they actually can they have show notes that get all put in for you.

Speaker 3: 43:58

They have no way, because I just signed up for Buzzsprout.

Speaker 2: 44:01

Oh yes, Perfect, Get it. I mean yes, definitely.

Speaker 3: 44:05

Oh, that's fantastic.

Speaker 2: 44:06

Yes, so they actually have. They have a thing that were the AI will give you title suggestions, they'll give you a transcript, they'll give you a show notes all in one shot.

Speaker 3: 44:17

Fantastic so good.

Speaker 2: 44:19

I was actually going to say this is where I'm like thank God for AI. So so that's good. So you're on the right track there as far as that goes. Thank you for using Buzzsprout. They're a good company. They're good people, yeah, so how are you building your let's talk about your email list a little bit. How are we actually building the email list?

Speaker 3: 44:43

I'm just trying to get people to go to the website. I have a link tree on my bios for everything for Facebook, for Instagram, for LinkedIn, locals, all that, and so my. You can literally connect to any of my other sites and the website all from the link tree, bio link and then just directing people on the website to sign up for the newsletter. The other aspect that I know that people do and I'm just trying to figure out how I want to incorporate this, if I do have a Facebook group specifically for the podcast called pushing through loss and I'm trying to figure out, there's already about 450 people or so in there.

Speaker 2: 45:30

Oh, my okay.

Speaker 3: 45:31

For anybody who now joins, do I want to have them put in their email before they become a member? Like is that questionnaire thing of saying, like, are you going to follow the rules? These enter your email address. I know that that's a really easy way to get people to then get your newsletter. I also don't want to be the spamming person. So, like, I'm trying to find that balance of saying, okay, do I want to ask for their email through that, or do I just want to keep directing them to the website?

Speaker 2: 45:59

Okay. So here's what I suggest and you could do. You know, do it either way, it's perfectly fine. I would not put an email opt in and the Facebook group. That's going to deter a lot of people from actually joining the Facebook group because they're going to like, I mean, it's a Facebook group, there's not a whole lot, of, a whole lot of thought into it, it's a Facebook group, right? So they're going to say, well, email address, I'm not going to give her, me my address, and then they're going to opt out. So I think not having that give me your email to get into my group would probably be a little bit better for you, because you want as many people as you can into that group so you can grow that group. So you want to give them every opportunity to come in, because when it comes to a Facebook group and that kind of thing, they're there for help. They're not there to give away stuff. So I think now the other side of that. I think that in that Facebook group, when you get to a certain amount, have an offer of your newsletter in that Facebook group and put that out like once every other week or something like that, because then, as that Facebook group shows, those people are going to want, they're going to realize that you're an authority in this area Because they've been reading your things and that kind of thing. They're like okay, she knows what she's talking about. Now I'm giving my email address to her for this newsletter or for this free gift or whatever it could be, and that's just a feeling I have. You know you don't want to give it away too quickly and that kind of thing, but yeah. Okay. Also, a good way to get emails is to have some kind of free giveaway of some kind. So, like I know you're talking we're talking about the book that you have three chapters on already. Give away a free chapter of your book in exchange for an email address, and that's a very easy way to throw it out a PDF and then just give that away. And then other side of that too is you actually get feedback from that first chapter to see how people like that first chapter and you can use that as you will.

Speaker 3: 48:34

Okay.

Speaker 2: 48:38

So that I think that would be kind of a double header for you, where not only are you getting email addresses but now you're getting feedback on the first couple chapters of your book. Right. And seeing how people like it, whether it's going to resonate with them or you'll get some ideas like this is good, but maybe if you did this and that kind of thing, so right yeah. And then what you want to do is start with there with your Facebook group, started there, and then, if they like it, then throw it in your social and send it out. Yeah, okay, and this way you're kind of test the market, putting your two in the market, seeing how these 500 people are so like this, and then if they go for it, then you know that it's okay to send out to the next group of people. Okay. Same thing with the course that you're building. You can have 500 people if you get one or two people to get into your course, even if it's for really, really, really cheap, like you know, 10, $15 or whatever Now not only are getting their email addresses, but now you're getting feedback from them about your course, right, right, and then after that you can send that out. Okay, does that make sense to you?

Speaker 3: 49:50

Definitely Okay.

Speaker 2: 49:54

Any questions about that so far?

Speaker 3: 49:57

I am on the same page and I love it.

Speaker 2: 49:59

Okay, good, good, all right. So what else we got here? The speaker class. I'm really interested in the speaker class for you. I'm really excited to see you going through that. I don't want you to keep me posted on how that works. Just DM me say, hey, we went through the speaker class today and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah or whatever you know. I'm interested to see how that works for you. Take all that part, take all that to heart. Don't push yourself too much. I mean get out of your comfort zone, though, but don't push yourself to where you kind of like, oh, I don't want to do this anymore, this is too much.

Speaker 3: 50:33

Yeah, no, I all of that. Like the one thing where I'm like, oh, I have to post something on Instagram that I'm like, okay, maybe I should start thinking about batching those together, because if I I'm going to get frustrated, then I know I have to have a game plan. So far with speaking, I'm like, oh, I can't wait to get onto more stages, I can't wait to share this message, I can't wait to hear other people's stories, so I'm I'm excited.

Speaker 2: 50:57

And one thing to really do and this is going to be great for you too is document your progress through the speaker class, turn it into context. Okay, so people other people can follow your story. Other people can follow your progress, because people love origin stories. People love to see that progress that you're having for yourself. Not just your friends, but any of your followers and your super fans love seeing progress and love to see your story and what you're doing. You know, take pictures, take a few videos of you doing actually go speaking about whatever you're speaking, anything like that. If they offer anything like that, or if you just selfie the thing, I don't care. Find a way to help people follow your story, because this is going to be a major part of your story, and you should invite the people that want to follow your story along.

Speaker 3: 51:51

Okay, I can do that.

Speaker 2: 51:55

I have a. I have another person that I follow and that I coach and she's taking a trip to Portugal to help kids in Portugal learn proper English, and she's going to be doing the same thing. She's going to be doing the same thing where she's documenting her progress and that kind of stuff. So I want to see the same thing for you as far as documenting your journey through speaking.

Speaker 3: 52:27

Okay, it's so interesting to me how I remember my dad as a kid when he first got his very first camp quarter and he would take it when we would go skiing and he'd have us all stand on the side of the mountain and we'd have to hold the microphone connected to this very large camp quarter that he was carrying on his back and he's like tell me about skiing and we're all like we just want to keep going, stop talking to us. And now it's like everybody's got a camp quarter in their pocket and they can take it out and record everything they do.

Speaker 2: 53:00

Yeah, yeah. It's amazing the progress that we've made from there. So, and now everybody's like I gotta do everything. This is the food I eat. You know, I'm like, okay, that's a little much, but you know.

Speaker 3: 53:12

Right, right, find the balance.

Speaker 2: 53:15

Yeah, so all right, the retreat is going to be great for you. I see a lot of good things coming from the retreat you're building, thank you. I think you should also take that same aspect and building the retreat build a retreat in public. Okay, show people that this is what I'm working on. This is the progress I'm making, because what's going to happen is people are going to see the progression that you're having in this building this retreat. Okay, she's doing this, she's really doing it. Boom, there it is. I've been waiting this whole time for her to finish this retreat. We need to do this.

Speaker 3: 53:58

Right, and now I want to go.

Speaker 2: 54:00

Yeah, exactly. So building in public is a very key, especially for something that's going to be that important, that kind of high ticket kind of thing. Okay. So you know, put it in your Facebook group, put it in your socials, whatever, because people are going to be following that progress, I guarantee it. Okay. All right, all right. What else is going on? Do you have any other questions? Of any other questions you want to cover anything that's come up in your mind since then?

Speaker 3: 54:40

No, I think that was everything. It was just a big help, Like I love. I love hearing your idea, so I really appreciate it.

Speaker 2: 54:50

Sure, okay. So what I'm going to do is what I did last time. What are the top three takeaways that you, that we've talked about, that you'd like, to make sure, take it with you.

Speaker 3: 55:00

Make sure that you have people follow along to put it out there, put show the progress of what you're doing, the connections, the one on ones being able to really think people and connect with each person that either comes to your account or is able to then follow you, or whatever it might be. And the third takeaway is to still work on 15 to 20 minutes of things that are on the back burner without actually putting them on hold.

Speaker 2: 55:36

There you go. That's a good one, that's I think that's. My favorite one so far is that last one, so I want to make sure you do that. Okay, okay, I still want you to keep that snowball roll, even though it's only a little flake at a time, eventually it will be a snowball right. Yeah. There you go, and I know you're out and about right now, but what's one thing that you're going to do as soon as we get off this phone and you get home, because I know you're kind of running around right now.

Speaker 3: 56:01

I think I'm actually going to figure out on my calendar where I can put the 15 or 20 minutes per week to say I'm going to sit down and work on my book.

Speaker 2: 56:13

Good, good, that's good to hear.

Speaker 3: 56:17

And like actually schedule it in there and say okay, when that timer goes off. That's what you're doing.

Speaker 2: 56:22

Yeah, and speaking of timers, set a timer for yourself for that 15 or 20 minutes on your phone. Yeah. Because, like, if you don't, if you don't set a timer for yourself and that you're going to keep going and not want to stop and you really should stop when you set that goal for yourself to stop you want to snap yourself out of that zone and check your surroundings. And then if you feel you continue, yes, continue. But if you feel like, okay, that's good enough for now. I need to move on to something else than move on to something else, if you don't snap out of it, you're going to lose that. So, yeah, keep set a timer for yourself, because that's what I do for me too. Okay. All right, so I'm going to go ahead and start. Thank you for listening to the coaching edition of the undiscovered entrepreneur brought to you by doing it today coaching. If you want to get across the start line, contact me, dj school at doing it today coaching at gmailcom. Say the words, do it now for a free two hour discovery call to see how I can help you in your entrepreneur adventure. Art and graphics by Elaine Wilson, supported by my Patreon, brian Briggs of Ocean Treat Creative and Oliver Siegel of Anall, and hosted by me, dj Scoob. Click the show notes below for more information and remember I can, I am, I will and I'm doing it today.