From Self-Assessment to Success: Deborah Nute's Entrepreneurial Transformation part 3
Join me, DJ Scoob, for a transformative conversation with Deborah Nute, an aspiring entrepreneur, as we dive into the importance of self-reflection, self-assessment, and personal growth. We'll reveal how Deborah has made incredible progress in these areas, with insights on how she plans to promote our podcast episode and her weekly coaching-inspired content on social media. Additionally, we'll explore the crucial role of sleep and physical health for entrepreneurs, and the steps Deborah is taking to improve her overall well-being.
Together, we'll uncover the value of prioritizing tasks, mental flexibility, and pursuing one's passions. Deborah will share her experiences with imposter syndrome and how she's overcoming it through various opportunities and collaborations. We'll also discuss the challenges of communicating spirituality in a coaching context and the importance of understanding our own direction. Listen in as Deborah shares her triumphant story of finding her first paid coaching session, and our dive into the topic of listening to our body's signals for personal growth.
Don't miss this empowering and insightful episode with Deborah Newt, as we help her navigate her entrepreneurial journey. Through discussing her progress in self-reflection, the significance of sleep and physical health, and the power of prioritizing tasks and pursuing passions, you'll gain valuable knowledge and inspiration to empower your own path. Tune in as we support Deborah in her journey, and learn how to apply these lessons to your entrepreneurial endeavors.
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Welcome to the Undiscovered Entrepreneur, the podcast where brand new entrepreneurs come to life and could quite possibly be discovered. Join me, DJ Scoob and the rest of the Scoob believers as we help these new businesses become a reality. And now, away we go.
Speaker 2:We now join DJ Scoob in the next coaching of Deborah Newt, already in progress. Right, there we go. Alright, so what did you think of the recording? I mean, i put out the episode with you. You're my first actual coaching episode that I had on my podcast. What do you think?
Speaker 3:I loved it. I was worried that I had said like I want to be honest in our sessions. Obviously I'm a very open person, as you know. So I was like God, okay, but I hope I didn't like throw anybody under the bus. But I absolutely didn't And I was so happy when I went back. I listened to the whole thing, like beginning to end, and I was actually really quite impressed with myself. I said I thought, you know, i think I'm describing everything super truthfully but eloquently, without the need to sort of say anything bad about anybody. So I thought it was really, it was perfect. I'm really happy with it being out there, really happy, and it's the first time I have like my whole story out there. You know I've talked about no, i'm nowhere on a video, like I think I'm, apart from our podcast, and what do we do with mass debaters? This is the very, very first time that I'm live speaking with somebody about my whole story. So that's a first and it's amazing And it feels well, i'll get to that. But but like in terms of like on Instagram, i've given sort of bits and pieces of what my story is, but I've never fully sort of revealed it, and so I was thinking I do want to promote the episode, and I don't know, if you know, one of the things I want to talk to you about today was sort of, in terms of accomplishments, is that last week I posted something. What was it? Oh, about how I struggle with the word spiritual in coaching and how, you know, spirituality can mean different things to different people. So that was going to be sort of the first of my weekly sort of bits of coaching-esque things that I want to put out there. I want to try to do that every weekend, and so I was thinking that what I could do is tie in our episode with a pose that I wanted to do anyway, about stepping outside of our comfort zone, because it is the first time that my story is out. There are a lot of people in Canada don't know that I was, you know, arrested and spent 11 years going through the criminal system here in Greece, and I just don't care if people find out about that. But I had to go through that over the last few days. I had to really sit with myself And I wasn't just sort of like, oh, screw it, who cares, like I really sat down. I thought, okay, deb, are you ready for this to? I'm not saying everybody's going to flock to listen to the episode, but are you ready for this to be common knowledge? And I really am. So that's what I'm thinking. I just wasn't feeling it this weekend about posting. So I think either I don't know maybe tomorrow I will Have you promoted it at all.
Speaker 2:Yes, like crazy, but how was it?
Speaker 3:How do I miss that?
Speaker 2:It's not, let's see. I didn't. It's let's see. Since it's part of a new weekly thing, i haven't really had the chance to do normal postings on it, so I just have a little bit on Twitter, but it's only like once or twice. It's not part of my rotation yet. Now I have a and I think I told you this already I have an AI that's working with me for my social media posts, but I haven't inputted all the all the information in it yet to have yours in the rotation, so that's gonna be coming up real soon here. For the last two weeks I've been kind of battling my own thing. My wife has been sick, and so it's. It's been tough to get some normal stuff out, and today's actually my first day in about two weeks I'm able to make any kind of progress. So, but you know that's okay, it's just part of the, it's part of the process, it's part of what we go through in life. It's fine, it doesn't bother me at all. At least I'm sitting down doing stuff that I still want to do, so um can I just ask you something?
Speaker 3:I'm sorry, i don't want to pry into your personal life. Are you married right now or is this an ex-wife?
Speaker 2:Okay so you don't have to tell me No no, it's okay, I don't mind, because I'm kind of in the same boat with you as your past too. Is that really need to be more open about my past and what I'm experiencing and that this so people know who I am? I am currently divorced. I still refer to as my wife because I still have strong feelings for her, and I really have a tough time dealing with the fact that she's my ex now.
Speaker 3:Okay.
Speaker 2:So, um, when I do refer to her as my wife, technically she's still as my ex, but I still talk with her, We still get along, We're still friends and things like that. So you know, I don't have any it will feelings for her to say, oh, it's my ex-wife, you know, or anything like that. So in my in my mind I still call her my wife, so okay, and you have a child together. Yes and no at the same time. I met him when he was six months old.
Speaker 3:Oh God, i love it.
Speaker 2:He's going to be turning 17 here soon, So that's beautiful Yeah. I became dad and I was glad to do it, You know so.
Speaker 3:I love that. Oh, he couldn't be luckier.
Speaker 2:I'm sure you're very lucky too, Oh he's the greatest kid in the universe I got. He came up with my tagline How can I, how can?
Speaker 3:I know So well, that's wonderful. And I hear you because you know. You know this is why you've mentioned it, because my ex-husband and I, after much pain and anger, managed to separate the same way. Just, you know, still like I'm going in for surgery tomorrow and he, you know, has said do you want me to take you, do you want me to come when you wake up and be there? And you know so. It's nice to have somebody in your corner, regardless of what you call them.
Speaker 2:Exactly, Exactly. So I just have the one person you could lean on, no matter what the circumstances are. They're still there for you.
Speaker 3:So that's always a good thing. Oh, wonderful Okay.
Speaker 2:So all right. So moving on now. Never that crap, never that, all right. So what else is going on? You said you had a couple of things that you wanted to talk about. We got. We got struggle with talking about spirituality, what else?
Speaker 3:Okay, So the reason I mentioned the spirituality was not so much to talk about spirituality. I'm just getting my notebook. I've got it, I just need to flip the page More so that I want to. I've been a little bit sporadic with my posting and I think that, as part of you know, part of like promoting myself as a coach, I think that I want to commit to not, I think, because that's something you taught me. I want to commit, no, really. There you go. Yeah To weekly sort of inspirational posts. Now, will those? I guess they would be aimed at getting my name out there. I get people to trust me and sort of you know, if I speak the same language as somebody, then having them maybe approach me for coaching. But I just, i just want to be a presence in people's lives And even if those people never do it sorry, you know that I'm going through a metapos, so I'd take my sweater on and off like 25 times. That's okay, i feel so friendly with you. Thank you for that. Yeah. Comfortable. So yeah, I do want to commit to one weekly post about anything that I can say that can maybe help somebody. So I'm going to write that down actually as a commitment Okay. Weekly. I'm calling it an inspirational quote, but that's pretty overused.
Speaker 2:Well, it could still be a general thing. It's fine, i understand where you're coming from on that.
Speaker 3:Yeah, so I wanted to talk to you about the questionnaire, okay, actually, so you know that I've come up with 10 areas that I think are need to be addressed in life. I think, why do I really do say I think a lot? That's incredible.
Speaker 2:You're starting to catch that now. See, that's what I was talking about. Once you actually know about what's going on, you'll be more conscious about catching yourself in the, in the words and what we say, and then now you could change them because you're catching yourself. And then, once you start changing you're catching yourself, you'll actually be able to speak more the way you really should be speaking instead of the way you think you should be speaking.
Speaker 3:Exactly. That totally made sense in my mind. So I have 10 areas that I believe are the main components of our life. Ideally, we will be good in all of those areas. I personally believe that you can't focus on all 10 areas at the same time. So the idea of the questionnaire was to sort of I decided to ask three questions under each of those topics. The names of those topics make the acronym becoming me, which I think I mentioned. So body, esotericism, career, becoming me, and so I kind of liked that. So the idea was for people to sort of like do a self assessment based on the three questions per area and then come to me and talk about their answers with me. So that would be a way of me sort of finding a little bit more out about them and sort of like forcing them to sit down with each of the areas of their life and think, actually, am I fulfilled financially? Am I fulfilled you know, i don't know in my marriage or whatever? So I did start writing out the questionnaire because that was one of the action points that we talked about last time. I just felt there was something gnawing at me And I feel like it wasn't that I didn't have time or wasn't. I felt like it was too robotic, It was too generic. So I think I left it a little bit, not that I'm not going to do, but I think that I maybe need to have a little bit more coaching under my belt to make it a little bit more personalized. I'm not sure if that's a cop out. I felt like it was just very generic, But as a I think I have to define what is my purpose with this questionnaire? What am I trying to do? If it's just an information gatherer for the first time I'm going to sit down with a client then yes, it can be generic just to get sort of an overall view of where they are. But if it's a questionnaire, if it's just an information gatherer, yes, if it's a questionnaire, this is, i think, what was tripping me up, and now that I'm talking to you about it, i'm realizing it. But if it's a questionnaire where I want people to fill it out and be like holy crap, i didn't realize that I had neglected that area of my life, or, wow, this is a question that I've never asked myself, that's what was tripping me up. So I think I need to figure out what the purpose of my questionnaire is And then, okay, so what you'll tell me is the good quotes that you are. You'll say, okay, well, don't overthink, do the generic one As a you know information gatherer. Then gradually, the more, let's say, specialized one might come up, i don't know. So that's what I'm not quite sure about with respect to that.
Speaker 2:Okay, so your questions about the question, your questions about the questions, are definitely a top priority of what we're going to talk about today. What else, was there anything else that you wanted to cover?
Speaker 3:Yeah, i'm just writing this down My whole way of existing over the last month, i've just been really really proud of myself, really really happy with the way the shadow work that I'm doing, like things that have come up and me really not being afraid to sit down and say, deb, you know, what is this triggering in you, what is that? Again, not in an overthinking, like abusing my brain kind of way, but in a I would like this information, i would like to know. So I've just been really what's it called? So in myself, so in my power. so, oh, setting boundaries left, right and center.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 3:And you know, but still in the polite, kind way, like without changing my character, just you know, i've just been really proud of that. And the other thing I wanted to say is that I've just been so optimistic, like truly believing that I am going to achieve my goal of being, you know, financially and geographically geographically to independent and financially very well off, and I think that that's going to be achieved through coaching, through podcasting. I even had this, like I had the craziest idea And the amazing thing was that I was like, just do it And I'll tell you what it was. So I went, i did my photo shoot last Saturday. Right, i'm not thrilled with the photos. Now, i'm not sure if it's because I'm being critical of my appearance or I feel like it's a little bit of both. Like I'm not super happy with the way it turned out And I feel like she didn't capture sort of the spirit of who I am. She didn't like I could have been anybody posing, but that's okay, i'm hoping that this will be the first of many photo shoots. And then I went to the gym the next day and I was feeling really good about my body And I don't. I meditated Oh, and that was sorry. That was another thing. I think I had committed to meditating for 21 days, which I achieved, that goal. And now I keep. yeah, I keep meditating because I just love it. So now I'm doing it without even. I'm just doing it because I like it, not because I feel like I have to achieve some sort of a goal. So I got this crazy flash in one of my meditations. This is you don't understand how hard it is for me to say this So this is progress facilitated by you. I was like, why don't you send your photos to a modeling agency and sell? all right, yeah, but like sell the fact that you're 52. Like, not try to be like, try to inspire women. Like I'm not saying what am I saying? I guess what I'm saying is that you can take control of your body and your appearance and you can own any age that you're at, And I'm not down on myself for being 52. I was a year ago, but now it's like some of the pictures turned out okay And then I was thinking I could take pictures up because I do have a, I'm pretty fit, I'm pretty committed to my personal training that I do, And I could take even just myself some pictures of me sort of owning my muscles and my tone, And I thought that could be inspirational for a woman my age or I don't know. I didn't do it because I didn't, I don't think I had time that day And then this weekend I just wasn't in that frame of mind at all, But just the fact that I thought of something so off base for myself and didn't like shoot it down, I was actually really excited about it And you know once, the worst thing that can happen I send my pictures and never call me right Like-.
Speaker 2:You are learning so much Like I'm tearing up right now.
Speaker 3:I'm so proud of you.
Speaker 2:Oh, thank you, i really am because you know, Deb, that I talked to for the very first time ever would never have done anything like that. I know, i know And taking control of your thoughts and emotions and saying this is not who I really am, this is who I am And this is who I want to be. It's just like so heartwarming for me to know that you're doing that. That is completely off, that's completely off the wall. Crazy, that is something that's amazing Because you're raising and that's gonna make I'm just gonna bring this up later, but I'm gonna bring this up now. When we first talked on our first session, we talked about your zone of genius in raising your roof of love and abundance. You have gone exponentially over that roof. You really have, and just in our few minutes of conversations today, i can tell because you're sending photos to an agency, you're taking photos, you're working on this questionnaire. You're questioning why am I waiting for things? This is all stuff to raise that love and abundance roof for yourself, and I'm really so proud of you to hear that you're doing that, Like look, I got tears in my eyes, I'm crying.
Speaker 3:I'm so glad. Well, I can't cry, as you know.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but I'm really proud of you. I am really proud of what you've done. You let me know how that turns out. You let me know how those shots turn out. If you decide to take some of your own shots and take them to a modeling agency, do it. Just see what happens. What's the worst they're gonna do? They're gonna say no, okay, sure, whatever.
Speaker 3:Well, exactly, i'm not a model now, and if I'm still not a model a month from now, that's okay. But then I thought, even if one company wants a photo shoot of women in my age category, promoting, i don't know, beauty products or sports wear, whatever, i could make $2,000 just for a shoot like one, you know, like why not? Why not?
Speaker 2:Then you could take that money, invest that money into whatever you need to move on with your entrepreneurial adventure. That's how that works.
Speaker 3:Exactly, exactly. But just as you're saying, like just the fact that I'm starting to be open to this kind of idea is just so much a testament to how much I've peeled back the layers and I'm just letting the feelers get out there. And another thing sorry, i'm just gonna write down the modeling because I just wanna connect.
Speaker 2:Oh, go ahead. Yeah, write it down. Write it down, i'm gonna.
Speaker 3:The other day I woke up and I'm like I have two houses in Greece. I have the main house where my daughter stays, and then we have the satellite house where we I've told you that we go back and forth from that house. We share In August. Well, all throughout the summer the satellite house, the small apartment, is empty because my ex and my daughter go to his village and stay there pretty much all summer, and then in August the big house is also empty. So I've got two empty houses in Greece. In the summer, because I go to Canada, i take Rosie with me, so there's nobody in Athens I thought, why don't I? I'm not gonna put out ads, but why don't I tell my family, tell your friends that if they want a very cheap place to stay in Athens from June to August, even if I made $100 a night, which I think is pretty cheap for Greece- I'm not sure or even $75 a night. that would pay my mortgage for that month. That would pay my rent for the other house for that month. Like, my point is that and I did I actually texted my family. we have a group chat. I said, guys, i just had this incredible idea And if it ever comes up in conversation I'm open to it. And then I just let it lie and whatever happens, and just the fact I'm just getting back to this, like just the fact that I'm starting, i don't feel so like bound by my physical, what's it called existence. Like I feel like there are endless opportunities that I'm finally starting to open up to. And even if nothing happens, it just goes to show how much what I'm putting out into the universe is starting to jive with what's available in the universe for me. I have a big thing. I don't wanna lose you here, but I don't think I will. I have a big thing about what I call either like filtering or meshing Like. if I'm not open, if I'm not open to the possibilities of the universe, whatever is out there that's possible for me, if it comes to me and doesn't mesh up with my filters, what I'm got open, nothing's ever gonna pass through, Right? Did that make any sense to you?
Speaker 2:No, it makes perfect sense. actually, that's really good, because you gotta have that filter.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:You gotta know what that filter is and what to let through and what not to let through. That's just like saying yes to something and no to something else.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:I mean, like, when you're saying yes to something, you're also saying no to something, and that's something to keep in mind too, and I think a lot of it has to do with the meshing or it's your interpretation of that same thing. When you're saying yes to something, that means you have to hold something back. When you're saying no to something, you're opening something up for a yes for something else. And that's that same idea in meshing, where, if it's a possibility that fits in your I'm gonna say it with fits within that zone of genius that you're going through right now, you let it through. If it doesn't fit in that zone of genius, if it doesn't fit through that mesh, you don't let it through.
Speaker 3:Exactly, so it makes perfect sense. Yeah, it will go through. It's just yeah, i've set it up. Yeah, i know what you mean. So wait a second. What did you say in modeling and then the renting? my house is So. Something else that I'm really blown away by is you know very well that I've been talking about my brain fog, and brain fog has been such a thorn in my side for so long And it's only been exacerbated by menopause, right, and I've been to every doctor. I've been to neurologists, i've been to psychiatrists, i've been to oh God, you name it, and I just I am not probably is a combination of talking to you and talking to myself and stuff, but I have completely renamed it and reframed it. Now, when I get this brain fog, i know that God wants to talk to me. It's God, it God, whatever you call God. Right, it's my time, it's my signal to sit down, meditate, because there's something in there that needs to be processed, and what it feels like is fog and something pulling on my brain, but what it is is Communication. It's a message, it's something that I need to decipher, but in order to decipher it, i need to be still So. I just like, like I used to. There were Literally months where I would be like, okay, i'll be okay when my brain fog goes away, meaning that for the next three months I am accepting that I'm not gonna be okay or I'll be like, oh you know, i've got a trip to Canada. I really hope I don't have brain fog, because that'll just mess things up All my power away, right?
Speaker 2:That's that self, self sabotage that we talked about that one time. You're saying okay, you know that you're manifesting it into yourself where it's gonna come about, probably when at the worst time It probably could come about because you said it was going to.
Speaker 3:Exactly, it was like praying for it to happen. worrying is like praying for something You don't want to happen. So I've been really, really, really I just I feel like such a freedom. I don't like brain fog And I get I've been getting like really like chest pains, but I think is Anxiety, and even there I'm able to just get to that quiet place and I believe in, you know, parallel universes and I, you know, i think to myself There is a version of me right now that doesn't have chest pain and what I need to do is mesh with her And I'm able to get to that space. I just feel a lot more in control of These things that are going on with. you know me physically I So Brain fog, chest pains, just FYI, i think I told you this I'm going in for surgery tomorrow to fix my Have a deviated septum, which that's like in here I can't breathe out of one of my nostrils. Yeah, i think you're Yeah yeah, so I'm going in tomorrow, we'll be out on Tuesday and And I'm you know, i'm thinking that that's also maybe a cause of this brain fog. We just not oxygenating. You know my head and I don't even care anymore, but I just I guess it's good that I'm Taking steps, you know, in all areas of my life in terms of my physical health, and I know that I wake up from snoring and I don't have good sleep, so I think this is a positive thing, like going to get this fix. So Hopefully I'll come out on the other side.
Speaker 2:Well sleep is vital to a special entrepreneur is just because when we go through that sleep cycle, once we hit that REM sleep, it's our brains cleaning out the bad stuff and Filing away the stuff that we need to file. When it you don't get that that right amount of sleep or through that REM sleep, if you keep waking yourself up before you hit that run sleep, which is usually what happens Then they get backed up and turns into a brain fog because you have, technically, files that are not being filed away. That's how I kind of place that. So yeah, it's yeah. I'm thinking that's gonna be a lot better for you once you get that and things will just get better.
Speaker 3:I think so too. And then you know, i'm not sure if you have experience, you know anybody close to you with menopause, but you get night sweats right. So I'm waking up from the snoring, i'm waking up from night sweats. You know, now I have allergies, so I'm waking up from, you know, my nose running and stuff like that. And I absolutely agree that Sleep is something we're, so I Sometimes like it's a waste of time to sleep.
Speaker 2:You want to be the first person to tell me that yeah, exactly, but no, it's, i can.
Speaker 3:and now I'm, as you were saying, like in the beginning. now I'm able to observe Wet, like if I've got like extra brain fog or this kind of the other thing, it's like okay, but last night you only slept four or five hours, so That's all the proof you need, kind of thing what I Was to a point before I started my entrepreneur adventure where I was on to doing maybe two or three hours of sleep at night and I was so out of it, foggy things like that.
Speaker 2:But once I actually started sleeping more than six to eight hours of sleep I was so much more productive that that other extra two hours that I could have been doing something else, but very, very poorly. I can rip right through it in like 10 or 15 minutes. It just seems like, as long as you have a clear head, you, even though Mentally you're thinking, well, it's just a waste of time. It's two or three hours I could be doing something else, but in that same two or three hours that we're in sleep We could have finished something in 10 or 15 minutes with that sleep. So our quality of production in that time, because we had that sleep, is so much higher than it would be if we didn't get that sleep. Exactly, Absolutely yeah, and that's and that's the way we kind of need to think about that, and a lot of, a lot of entrepreneurs That don't sleep that that say, okay, well, i could be using this to time to do more editing, or I could be doing this more time to produce something else. It's poor quality. It's poor quality because their brain is not working the way it's supposed to. They took those extra couple hours of sleep. The same thing could have been a higher quality in less time, because it's working a lot better.
Speaker 3:Exactly. I mean, i'm a morning person. I think you might be too. I'm not sure Chris certainly is, and I just now I'm able to say depth Instead of struggling with this. You know that some of it is going to take you an hour to do now and begrudgingly You're going to be like angry that you have to do. It will take you 10 minutes when you wake up, because I'm just I'm not much clearer. So it's a super important thing to to recognize when you function best and and that kind of thing. Um, shoot, you were just talking and, oh, you reminded me of something That we're listening to, of the episode that you published. You said something about how I'll find, or like how I'll find, like being an entrepreneur, that I'll. You know I'll be more flexible like I might take my laptop to a cafe and work. I might find that 10 minutes here to get something done, not in a unhealthy, over productive way, but in a time management way, and it's so funny that I really find myself doing that. I Always kind of worked at cafe, so that's not something really new for me, but I can tell when I'm at home and I'm working on something. I can tell when I'm starting to get itchy and I know it's time to go to a cafe and work, because I just need a change of scenery. But Just today I Ended up. I went to the gym and my Coach, who is a very good friend and would do anything for me He had he Thought he might have broken his foot last night, yeah, yeah, but anyway, he's a true person We I was like, oh hey, i'm happy to cancel, believe me. And he's like you're not getting out of this that easily, oh boy. But I said okay, but let me take you to the hospital. So he was like no, no, no, no. And I was like no, i'm taking you to the hospital, end of story. So I was a little bit uncomfortable because I had a very set day in my head, like after the gym, i'm gonna do this and. But I was like, no, i I need to support this person who has supported me so many times. And Of course we ended up having it was fine and he, this foot is gonna be fine, and we've been out for brunch and it was quite lovely. But it set me behind. So I got home and I was like, okay, i want to have a sleep. I do like sleeping in the afternoon on the weekends and I was like, but shit, you know God. Then I've got a record and I've got to clean up the house and I've got 25 loads of laundry to do. And then I've got Scoob and I want to be fresh for him and I was starting to like over-process and I was waiting for one of my loads of laundry. So I'll just wait for this load to finish and then I'll lie down. So I had about seven minutes and I was stressing about a few emails I had to send. When I woke up and it was just one more thing I had to do and I was like, deb, just use those seven minutes and shoot off that email. It's really not a big deal and again, if I had decided that I'm not gonna do anything for seven minutes, i'm just gonna stare at the ceiling, and rest. That would have been okay too, but I just felt like I'm starting to get into that mindset of Like sort of dealing. I Have a tendency to, or had a tendency to, think of everything as like Mountains. Like I'm gonna wake up from my nap and it's gonna be like the mountain of thinking of the kitchen, the mountain of doing the laundry, the mountain of Cooking or whatever, and I just was able to shoot off that email Which really there couldn't have been anything easier and it just chipped a little bit away at that mountain and it made waking up Sounds funny, but just you know I'm out of five minutes change my whole outlook on everything I had to do when I woke up. So I feel like I'm shifting into that more flexible, like a little bit away from that. You know nine to five will be now I'm at home, i don't do anything Sort of fitting you in where I want to, where I can, where it's convenient, and that kind of stuff.
Speaker 2:Love it, love it. You're prioritizing, yeah, you're prioritizing, your, your prioritizing this is really hard, but if I chip away at that's a little bit, that's a little thing, it's gonna make a biggest difference. I'll give you a good example. When I work with my, my restaurant that I work at, it gets busy. A lot of times There's an hour and a half way to the door. I'm working four tables at the same time and that kind of thing, but I find myself like really busy doing something. But I got to get this drink off to this table. They've been asking for this grass of soda for this long. So say hey, so, and so do me a favor. Can you just take this glass of soda over to this table for me And you'll find that that little bit of time that he saved you that little chip. Yeah, for the rest of the night I. Believe that, i totally believe that and and for burning something like that into you know, something similar to that into your day to day. We're taking care of that one little thing That's kind of nagging at you a little bit. We'll, we'll just open up the rest of your day for you. That's amazing, that's really cool, that's really good, so, so amazing. I'm glad you were able to work that out. Do not underestimate the power of a power nap, though. Prioritizing that, that email over that, that I mean. How how long did it take Technically? how long did it take for you to put that email together?
Speaker 3:Oh my god, i have the document ready. I just had to attach it right for sentences and press send. So four minutes.
Speaker 2:Okay, so Like for that four minutes.
Speaker 3:Heck, you could have took a five-minute power nap and after that, been okay you know And that's another thing that I For because of my allergies and whatnot I didn't actually end up sleeping this afternoon And that's something that would have really. I mean, i was lying down but I just didn't. I don't feel like I got into an actual sleep and That's something that would have really thrown me off. I would have just woken up and I didn't get my nap in, and that's gonna screw up the whole evening and I just don't let myself Get into those thought processes anymore, like It's like it is what I decided is yes, if I decide that I really needed that nap and it's gonna screw up my whole Evening, well then that's what's gonna happen. But if I decide that, well, you know why, doesn't have to screw up my whole evening. I mean, i slept enough last night and I'll, god willing, i'll get enough sleep tonight. It's okay if I didn't get the best rest today. Yeah, just being in the moment and defining things in a way that is beneficial for you, i think, is what I'm doing. You know, can I just give me one second? I'm so sorry. I think there's a little paw.
Speaker 2:That's okay. At least you let him in there, that's alright, yeah.
Speaker 3:Yeah, he'll survive so Yeah.
Speaker 2:So I see you prioritizing and I see you instead of making a mountain out of things You're kind of mentally like, okay, this is what I need to do. Not, i need to do this, this, this, this, this and this. Yeah, you know what I'm saying and then being able to be able to process those things in that way Shows so much growth and what you've done since we've started It really has. Yeah so I'm really God. This has been such an amazing session. I'm just so proud of all the accomplishments that you've made in just what the two months that we've been doing this.
Speaker 3:I know, and it's amazing, you've been so instrumental, because and I'm not done- yet Yeah more stuff to tell you It's, it's, it's what we are talking about. But just Having somebody in my corner who from the get-go, believed in me when I didn't necessarily believe in myself, and being accounted Accountable to you not in a fearful way like frig I better get this done or because it's not your nature. Anyway, he's gonna think I'm a loser, but more like no, this is an opportunity. Somebody's in my corner rooting for me. You know I found a cheerleader and It's been. I feel like you just were that Element. I mean, you know I had done a lot of work on my own, you know that. But I feel like I just needed this impetus, called you to just sort of come and push just that little nudge. I needed to take that free fall into what I wanted to, which is Pursuing my coaching career.
Speaker 2:So I'm not some other new things too, which I'm I'm really impressive. Yeah yeah, yeah, but you're gonna find more and more. The more you open up to things like this, the more more things are gonna fall into your lap a lot easier, a lot quicker than you would have if you didn't. You know, open opportunity has come to those people who keep an open mind to it, instead of closing the door exactly.
Speaker 3:It's incredible and just sort of in that vein, like Chris and I were laughing because we I Find it kind of stressful having to put an episode together. I mean, i only have to put an episode together Once every two weeks because we interchange, as you know, but of course I usually take the first week off and then I'm like cramming at the last minute. So it's just I used to find it so stressful. I do still sometimes find it really stressful trying to get my topic together because I want to do it justice and I need to Find time and all that. And now suddenly we've had some proposals for some collaborations to show you know, go on some other Podcasts and all of a sudden we're juggling, not only getting our topics ready, but like recording with other people, and I'm like, but it's a good thing. Like it's not something I feel Burdened by. I'm like where the how did that change? Like when the last few ones feeling so overwhelmed by having to do one thing and then suddenly being able to juggle, but in a healthy way, these things I think it's because they're things that we love. So you know we don't see them as work, but you still have to find those two hours. Those two hours aren't easy to find, you know. Yeah.
Speaker 2:I definitely know just, and I feel I feel the same way too when I'm working Two jobs, working my podcast, doing you know this with you, things of that nature That's a lot to juggle, family being with my son and I kind of think, but I don't mind doing it Because I love so much and that's us working on our zone of genius. That's what the zone of genius does for us. When we're doing something we love, we, it doesn't feel like a burden juggling so many things because we love doing it exactly, and I often think, okay, well, what would I be doing if I wasn't doing this?
Speaker 3:and I think that I want to lie in bed and watch Netflix, and sometimes that really is what I want to do, but it's what I want to do for a half an hour. It's not what I want to spend all day doing. So I, instead of looking at these as chores, i think that's actually. This is exactly how I want to spend my time. Actually, this isn't a chore, so it's again. It's reframing, renaming, redefining. All right, should I tell you more?
Speaker 2:Yeah, tell me more. I love this, this is, this is fantastic.
Speaker 3:So I okay Well, i already told you this, you, you got it out of me. I went on the, an app called matchmaker, which sounds like a dating app, but it's not. I don't know if you've heard of it, and It's exactly what you gave me the idea. You said that there was a Facebook group where you can sort of say what you talk about and people can ask you to be a Guest on their podcast. Yeah, so I'm not sure why I didn't go into Facebook. I just started googling. You know The stuff and it came up with this app. So I created a profile for myself as me, not as Chris and Deb and I gave a little bit of. I don't think I mentioned. I might have mentioned having a podcast, but it was more about my struggles with my previous struggles with mental health and how I want to. If I could help anybody through that as a coach, then that's what I want to do. And okay, within an hour I had one guy asking me to be on a podcast, but I felt like it was very robotic, very generic. I just wasn't interested. And then, a day or so later, i've got a very genuine request to be on a podcast. They are a wonderful couple. It's spirituality, it's religion based, but they don't like you don't have to be Christian to go on it, like you can be anything. So they talk about spirituality based on animation because they're super animation buffs, like if they love anything to do with animation, so that's their thing. And last year during May, they did a whole month related to mental health and it was so popular that they are doing another month this May And they asked me to be on one of their episodes for the mental health series.
Speaker 2:Oh, that's great.
Speaker 3:Yeah, it is. So I had a meet and greet call with the guy last week and it was a great call. I told him my story and he's like this is fantastic, we really love you to be on it. And they chose an animation for me because I haven't watched cartoons since my daughter was young, so I really not really up on cartoons. So they proposed this anime based on mental health Anyway. so I'm having a lot of fun watching that anime, taking notes, seeing how I can relate it to my struggles with mental health. Plus, i'm going to be on this podcast. you know something that might get promotion for me as a coach, for me as Chris and dad. It's just wonderful.
Speaker 2:No wonderful. I'm a huge anime fan, like a lot of anime, so I'm like curious what anime they had. You do.
Speaker 3:Orange. Have you heard of orange? I'll send you the link. I don't watch a lot of anime. Rosie went through a phase where she did. I've only watched the first episode, i think there are 13. They're only 20 minutes long And it's about these kids who, i don't know, find letters to their previous selves from like their selves 10 years in the future. It's really interesting. I think a lot of the kids ends up committing suicide And they all sort of. Anyway, i'll let you know more when. I watch more. I like to call orange. You can find it on YouTube the whole thing. But I guess my point is that I always felt like a bit of a fraud, a bit of an imposter, like we've talked about. Sometimes I would even feel like a fraud when I was telling very factual things about what I have been through in terms of being suicidal. There was a little voice inside of me saying come on, it wasn't that bad. I'm not sure what that's all about, but this time I thought, no, that was a very real experience And I don't need to. I'm allowed to own that experience. That's something that shaped me And it's really sad when you don't even feel like you're entitled to your own experiences. That's how fraudulent I found myself to be, for whatever reason, but I was really just writing my profile on that app and being honest about my journey. That was hard, not because I'm afraid of people hearing my story, but because I was like come on, deb, it wasn't that bad. You're privileged, what are you whining about? But it really was that bad And I'm not sure why it's sometimes still hard for me to. I think it has to do with my upbringing and how my mom really and my dad but amazing people love them. But they were just very 80s, like let's brush everything under the rug, everything's good. The neighbors need to know that everything's perfect. And I think, because my mom had her own mental health struggles growing up which she's never talked to us about, i think that she really wanted to believe that everything was okay, like she didn't want us to open up about our struggles with mental health, because we all had them, because she was like no, no, no, everything's okay. We're a middle to high class family in a nice neighborhood and we go on nice vacations and we drive nice cars And so we're happy, right, are we happy, right, yeah?
Speaker 2:Yeah, a lot of that has to do with her upbringing too. if you think back, This is something that's gone on from generation to generation to generation to you.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:But it seems to me like it's. You are the generation where this is going to have to stop.
Speaker 3:Absolutely.
Speaker 2:And we need to break that chain of devalued thinking where everything is, you know, a sunshine of rainbows when it's really not. We've come to a place in our society where we are accepting that being not okay is okay.
Speaker 3:Exactly.
Speaker 2:And we are the generation and I'm not just saying like generation Xers, like us, but this is the generation. This is the time where we stop thinking that everything is okay And we open up to who we really are as a person and what really bothers us. That way, we can confront these thoughts, we can confront these negativities full force, with a head of steam and with a backup of somebody or a group of people or whatever to help back you up in those situations where you're having a bad time. So it's up to us to break this chain.
Speaker 3:Yeah, generational curse, i think it's called, or maybe not curse, but I guess it's. Yeah, it can be broken And I do feel that way about myself that I'm. That might just be, you know my purpose to just stop this chain And that's why I'm uber vigilant with my daughter and talking about mental health and, oh God, we just, yeah, talked about it to death. So, yeah, i totally agree with you, we can. I just feel like this, just like I always talk about as being like the life train. I just so many people I shouldn't be judgmental just think that this is just the way it is. This is no, you know what it doesn't have to be. I mean, you have the power. I'm not saying it's easy and in fact, i had this conversation with somebody the other day about how what challenged me to really start to feel better and take control of my life was because I actually realized it's sitting in my misery was the easy way out. Right, because it would be really effing hard to try to get better. So I was like you're actually like, you think you're miserable, but you're actually taking the easy way out. So you really want, you want to be kick ass, you want to be tough. You try to get better, and let's just see how you do about that.
Speaker 2:And the longer you stay sitting and doing nothing, the harder it's going to be to get out of that situation.
Speaker 3:Of course. So you know, this is really very, do me a favor.
Speaker 2:I want you to write down the word life train.
Speaker 3:Life Okay.
Speaker 2:That's, i think, for some reason that sticks out into my head, about something that you can use in your coaching.
Speaker 3:I absolutely agree with you and sorry to interrupt, but it's definitely one of my things where I want people to know. I feel like so many people are on the life train. They don't even know they're on it. They just don't even know that there are so many options out there, and I really want people to put on the brakes and say wait a second, who's driving me? or life Right, yeah. So, like I wrote it, down We're.
Speaker 2:So. This has become our reality, so we accept it, yes, and the only way that we can get off this train ride is to stop accepting this as being our reality and finding what our reality actually should be or is.
Speaker 3:Exactly. But in order to do that, you have to know what you want, And most people don't. And to know what you want, you need to know who you are, Which and again, it's not a criticism, because I'm in this journey myself, You know I it's a journey that never ends. So it's it's absolutely about stopping and assessing and and deciding where you want to go, Because, anyway, you know it's all very cliche, but you know we can all get in our car, But if we're not, if we don't know exactly where we're going, what's the point? Like you know, like you can't get somewhere. If you don't have a destination, you can't get there, anyway. But I don't think I explained that very well, but anyway, No, no, because you could actually build off that.
Speaker 2:So what do we need to do to get to that place? How do we, what do we need to do to know where we're going Sometimes? sometimes we have to stop and ask for directions.
Speaker 3:Yes.
Speaker 2:Right, and who do we ask the directions to? People like you, people like me, there you go Yeah. We we as coaches, are the GPS system.
Speaker 3:Yes, I like that Yeah.
Speaker 2:We're the stranger. You stop on the side and hey, where's the local library yet? And we'll tell you.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah, no, you're right. You know when the GPS says recalculating when you're gone off route. Yeah, we're the recalculators. Yeah, you could go this way, though Have you ever thought of going this way? There you go.
Speaker 2:That's a good thing about it.
Speaker 3:No, it's so, so true. Yeah, it's incredible. Anyway, i was gonna say that, but now I forgot what it was. Are you ready for the biggest reveal?
Speaker 2:Oh, I've been waiting this whole time for the biggest reveal. I thought I've actually been through it already, so there's something I don't believe it.
Speaker 3:I knew it was coming. I could feel it was coming And I knew it was gonna come in the right, perfect way. and it did. Yesterday I had my first paid coaching session.
Speaker 2:No, it did, congratulations. Thank you Wasn't for the guy from India, was it?
Speaker 3:No, no, i believe me, boundaries.
Speaker 2:Right right.
Speaker 3:Likely. But I said various. I told you about what I did. I told him that I don't need more friends.
Speaker 2:That was more of a joke than anything else. So tell me the story of how you found and process this to a point where you actually have a paid coaching out.
Speaker 3:Tell me how that worked. Okay, so somebody I grew up in a fairly small community, a suburb, so we all kind of knew each other And this is not something I've been wanting you to publish, but you'll know what to kind of. If you decide to publish this session ever, you'll cut this part out right, okay, hang on.
Speaker 2:hang on a second, because if you really wish me to, Okay, I didn't want to do anything over personal Okay, so ask him to do it for free.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:Tell him something like this. Tell him that you know I normally would charge $700. Normally I would charge $700 for a coaching, but I'm only charging you this and in exchange can you make a website for me.
Speaker 3:Okay.
Speaker 2:And, trust me, he will say yes and then you will have a free website, because you are not only saving him a ton of money in your coaching, but you're helping him mentally.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:So I really feel that, if he's not, i mean you've already committed to this, which is fine, but I mean I really feel that the value of what you're giving him would more far exceed the value of a very like one or two page website, which he will probably put together in 15 minutes.
Speaker 3:Yeah, okay.
Speaker 2:Knowing most programmers.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, okay, thank you, i appreciate that, but you're still proud of me, right? Oh?
Speaker 2:yes, having that icebreaker of your very first paid coaching is going to just rocket you forward. It really is, because it's going to give you that feeling that you're making. Not only you're making a difference in somebody else's life, which is my main thing, but somebody has said yes to you and somebody didn't just say yes to you because you know you're coaching. Somebody said yes to you because they put a dollar amount down to say yes to you, and that's a big, big difference between saying yes and saying yes with your wallet.
Speaker 3:I couldn't agree more Absolutely. Oh shoot, i forgot what it was. But Oh, and word of mouth, word of mouth. I mean, i know that when I was teaching yoga, all of a sudden my phone was ringing off the hook. Just your word of mouth. I just certainly didn't have a site, i didn't have anything. So I know that that's another thing.
Speaker 2:So do you remember, if you heard it and if you listened to our first coaching on my podcast? In that first coaching I talked about saying that if you could think of somebody, you could give away a coaching to you.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:I want you to do the same thing with this guy. Say, hey, my coaching's worth seven. Make sure you Saying that $700 a month is going to give you a value, Okay. So saying hey, if you have a friend that you think you need coaching, here is a free discovery session that's worth $700 that you could give away to one person as a gift And then he'll give that away. That gives you a new contact and that gives you a discovery call where that can lead into possibly another paid client.
Speaker 3:Yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 2:So that's how I would go about that. That gives him the good feeling that, hey, i'm giving away such a great value to somebody that really means a lot to me, and then you're getting a client out of it, a possible client out of it.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah, okay, no, perfect, perfect, okay. So that was my big reveal.
Speaker 2:That's fantastic. I am in extreme. I thought I was proud of you before after all this, but now, oh, my goodness, oh, i am so happy for you. I really really am Thank you.
Speaker 3:Well, thank you because I don't think I would have done any of it without you. Honestly, Honestly, I appreciate.
Speaker 2:Hold on, i'm blushing. Okay, thank you very much. All right, so I know that's the big reveal. Is there anything else that you want to discuss before I go into what I have to discuss with you?
Speaker 3:No I don't.
Speaker 2:Okay, all right, so I'm going to work backwards here. From what I remember, that was so so much, so so much. One thing I want to touch on and I'm going to go on through it again is the imposter syndrome. Okay, i'm not going to say you still have it as bad as before, but you still have it. I do. And a lot of things that you explained to me, especially when it comes across the money situation, like we talked about just now, or saying who am I to do this? that kind of thing that still entails a lot of imposter syndrome that you're experiencing. You are breaking out of it though. You are on the right track to break out of the imposter syndrome. So just kind of bear that in mind, where you're kind of keeping an eye on what you're saying to yourself and the actions that you take, in catching yourself in imposter syndrome personalities, okay. So keep that in mind. You're, you have and I said this in the first one too you've been through a lot in your lifetime, okay, and that justifies a lot of what you have to talk to these people. You don't have to have a specific degree, you don't have you have experiences, which is a lot better than I think than a degree.
Speaker 3:Yeah, they're not mutually exclusive Yes, yeah.
Speaker 2:So take those personal experiences to save yourself. I have room to speak about this because I have lived this. Yes, and that goes into what I was saying in the first and our first episode of using those as as maybe a niche of people to talk to.
Speaker 3:Yeah, so And I think going on this podcast that's specifically about mental health might is sort of like in that vein.
Speaker 2:Like people will know that I walk the walk, let's say And I want you to actively seek out more podcasts to be on, because that's going to give you. The more podcasts you're going to be on, that's the more credibility that you can get, and if you do have this website, that's put out.
Speaker 3:Yes.
Speaker 2:And he asked him for a way to embed the episodes that you're in into your website.
Speaker 3:Okay.
Speaker 2:So and that's what I'm actively doing right now too, because I've been on several other podcasts and I want somebody to be able to go to my website and listen to these podcasts So they know who I am as a person, not just the guy that's behind the ask the questions, but who I am as a person, And they'll know what I stand for and that kind of thing. You know, because I've been a couple of entrepreneur podcasts I was on I missed you on on mass debaters, What I was on that I was on the cartoons. Oh yeah, you. Boy bands and boy bands and cartoons.
Speaker 3:Yeah, because Chris asked me to help her out with the boy band, so I gave her a list. Yeah, because that was you like. it was like 430am or something. Yeah for you, you for us. Yeah, and I have to wake up at work and you know well, chris has a pretty tough day too, but anyway, she was a sort of it was easier, no, whatever, anyway, so my point is I'll probably end up even putting that episode on my, just so people know that I'm not just a guy that likes like entrepreneurship, but I like cartoons, i like you know these other things too.
Speaker 2:people get to know who I am personally. So if you get if you do get that website put together, see if there's a way you can kind of like put these episodes on your website so people can understand who you are as a person.
Speaker 3:Yes, okay, for sure.
Speaker 2:Okay, so the brain fog. I want to talk a little bit more about the brain fog. I'm glad you identified the brain fog as some kind of communication between something that's happening, something that's happening in your life, or something that's happening that you need to be aware of, to slow down to think about it. Yeah, you know that's a great way to think about it, and also the pain that you have in your chest. These are things that our body is using to communicate with us. There's something going on, not just so much as like you're having a heart problem or so your liver is doing something weird, but your body is trying to tell you something about what's going on around you.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:So, for example, i feel fear in my throat. I also feel anger in my throat. This is. This is a lot, of, a lot of what I feel. That's not. happiness happens here and here.
Speaker 3:Wow.
Speaker 2:So sometimes it happens here, depending on the situation. If I'm, if I'm happy, i feel it here in my, in my, in my lungs and my it's just different places, wow. So when you feel, when you can narrow down where that feeling is and why you're feeling it, you're going to Oh, i'm having chest pains, that means some this is happening, or I'm having a brain fog because this is happening. So when you've picked it out, you'll understand why you're having these different types of feelings in your body and able to compress down the time that it takes to understand what's happening.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:So like when I'm upset I know I'm getting upset Like right at the onset I start feeling something here. Oh, wait a minute, i'm upset about that. Instead of waiting for it for myself to explode to understand that I'm upset at something. I'll feel it here, something going on that's upsetting me and I can stop and think about it and stop that from happening before it starts up on the outside. So pay attention to your. your body aches, your, your, your pains, that you're having in your chest, even your brain fog. It's trying to tell you something.
Speaker 3:Okay, absolutely, i totally agree with you, yeah.
Speaker 2:Okay so so pay attention to that. I think the brain fog that you're having now, as compared to what we first started, is a different type of brain fog. now It's a brain fog that's trying to tell you to slow down.
Speaker 3:Yeah, instead of listening And listen.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, because you weren't doing that before, you'd have a brain fog and you. you just kind of like right, I was at its mercy, Mercy Yeah exactly, and now you use that as a communication device to understand that you need to slow down and think about something.
Speaker 3:Yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 2:That's good. Yeah, you are. This is. This was very, very interesting. You're finding different ways to make an income stream for yourself.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Isn't that crazy? Because now, now you're looking at not just your coaching and not just podcasts, but now you're looking at the housing market, You're looking at modeling agencies all different sources of incomes that you can do to fit into one pile of money that you can use to do whatever you want Exactly. Isn't that what it?
Speaker 3:is.
Speaker 2:Isn't that what it's all about? Yes, so remember when I talked to you on the first steps. I know I'm going to remember friends back at you because we it's been producing the thing, but you talked about how you want to get more mobile about what you're doing, right, yeah, and you wanted to take three years to be able to do this kind of thing, but if you start getting these income streams, working an all-time job you know you're going to be able to do that, and you're thinking, and all of them are starting to work together. Don't you think you could do it in less than three years?
Speaker 3:Absolutely, oh God. Yes, i mean, the three years was just that. That was like my ultimate cutoff, because you know, but yeah, i can see all of it making. I can see things being very different in even a year.
Speaker 2:Right, right, yeah. So when I say I see you doing these things in less than three years, that's what I'm talking about.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:I just I mean the renting of the places when they're empty. Brilliant.
Speaker 3:Yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 2:It's a no brainer way to make some income over the months of these people who are there. Just be careful who you rent to. That's all I really Yeah.
Speaker 3:That's why I've only told like family so far. But yeah, and you if you have any friends.
Speaker 2:Heck, i might take a trip out there, who knows. But anyway, just yeah, be kind of particular about who you tell, don't just put it on Facebook. Hey, i got a place for rent, you know, don't? do that. No, but things will start happening where and I'm starting to see this already to where things are falling to your lap. You'll just come across the guy, or you have a certain family member that says, hey, you know, i have, i'm going to be taking this trip, or whatever You know. Oh, i have a place you can stay at. Why don't you stay exactly X amount you know, or whatever Exactly? Do more than $100 a month? Baby steps? Yeah, i know, but I mean you're renting a whole place for him. Okay, i know I touched on this a little bit more, a little bit earlier, but you're meshing, talking about your machine, what you're saying yes to, what you're saying no to, what you're filtering, to what's important, to what's not important Brilliant, that's fantastic And I'm really proud of you for that. Because you're starting to, you're starting to understand boundaries. You're starting to understand what to say yes to, what to say no to, what's going to be working in your zone of genius and what's not. Yeah, because at a certain point which sounds like it's coming up real soon you'll be able to say yes to things that you know for a fact. You're in your zone of genius and know the things. That's not in your zone of genius and let those things that are not in your zone of genius either be shipped out to other people, other people or just completely. So that way you're always working in your zone of genius, and that's really what it's all about, and it's finding things that will work and that zone of genius for yourself.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Your thoughts are a lot deeper than they used to be. Yeah, they really are, and raising awareness to the, to those deeper thoughts are making you more optimistic about your, your future. They're making you think a little harder about what's going to come next, right? And because of that, it's actually raising your roof of, of your zone of genius that we talked about in that first round, and I'm seeing that level go up and up and up and up Just every time that I talk to you you're raising that roof of love and abundance for yourself. So that upper limit problem that you're having, that you had Yeah. Yeah, it's starting to dissipate and you're raising that roof. And then, when you hit that plateau again, make sure you don't self sabotage yourself. understand that this is what's happening, and then you could go to the next level.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah, absolutely Totally agree.
Speaker 2:Okay, anything across your mind at this point before I move on.
Speaker 3:No.
Speaker 2:Okay, i just want to make sure I give you an opportunity to, you know, talk or anything like that, in case you need. Yeah, so I want to talk about this questionnaire.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:I know this, this questionnaire is going to be one of your biggest things, for your, for your coaching. Did you need it for this one? No, not really No, but it helps.
Speaker 3:But I might send it to him. Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:Now.
Speaker 3:I have more of an incentive to do it.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:People love questionnaires.
Speaker 3:Okay.
Speaker 2:Because they learned something about themselves that they didn't know. Like you talked about, they learned something about themselves They didn't know, or you know. It's just human nature to answer questions that are got oh okay, cool, you know, and that kind of.
Speaker 3:Thing.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so I want to talk a little bit more deeply about your questionnaire at this point. Okay, so you're saying that the questionnaire that you have put together is kind of static. It's your first it's your first iteration of your questionnaire. Don't get down on yourself, because it sounds a little bit static. You're just getting started.
Speaker 3:Okay.
Speaker 2:Okay, so don't don't let that, you know, get you down or anything like that. What I would like you to do, though, is and I don't know if you've done this or not, but have you asked yourself those questions?
Speaker 3:Yeah, I would say for the most part yes.
Speaker 2:Okay, you may have asked yourself those questions, but did you answer those questions like on a piece of paper or something like that? Did you actually write down those questions or do you just say them in your head?
Speaker 3:I think mainly my head. like I know, i did it a few years ago when I was being coached. But yeah, that's this information. The answers change all the time. So, yes, i should sit down. You're right, that's a really good suggestion.
Speaker 2:I really think you should sit down and not just say those the answers in your head, but actually sit down and actively write those answers, as you were be somebody that's on the outside taking that. Yeah right, if you listen to my episode zero, which I know, you have those questions that I asked myself in my episode zero. I didn't had no idea how I was going to answer those. I did not think of those ahead of time. Those are answers that I came up with on the spot And I did that on purpose because I wanted to put myself in the place of my guest and how they would possibly answer those questions. So I was kind of interviewing myself. Yeah a lot of podcasters and people of that nature will have a preset. Okay, this is how the answer is going to be, because it's going to sound good, but I didn't want that, because that's not how it's going to be. In my podcast. I want some true to the heart answers of my questions, and that's the way I want you to do this. Okay, because in those answers you're going to see how you could actually change those questions into something that might be a little more less than, let's say.
Speaker 3:Yeah, my questionnaire, i mean, I was really just thinking of the caveat question and then they would rank sort of from one to 10, like, for instance, i am in a career that I find fulfilling, and then they'd have to choose one to 10, five, seven, whatever.
Speaker 2:I wasn't looking for long answers, but maybe I should So if you want this questionnaire to change somebody's life and understand what's going on, they need to ask themselves why they answered the question the way they did.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:Why is this a five? Why is this a seven? Why is this a one?
Speaker 3:Yeah, what would it take for it to be a 10,?
Speaker 2:let's say Well, yeah, but that you're, you're, don't do that, because that's your job.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Your job is to get that seven to a 10. Your job is to get that one to a seven things of that nature. So what I would do if I were you, and this is just a suggestion. I'm not telling you what to do, But underneath that I would put why and have a text box there. Yeah, That's it. I don't even have to get technical about it. Why answer? It should be very simple to put it to just in there And then if you want to limit the characters to like 500 or something like that, that way doesn't get too, you know turning it into like Yeah, I don't want them to be overwhelmed either.
Speaker 3:Like you know, like I want them to, I want it to be doable. I don't want them to cast it aside because they're frustrated. Yeah, Okay.
Speaker 2:If you limit the amount of characters, they're going to have to condense what they think, once going through their head, down to a few sentences, okay, and that's going to make them think about what they have to say in a certain amount of time And that's going to get to say, well, why am I saying this? And that's where the thought process starts, and then you can actually build off of that.
Speaker 3:Okay.
Speaker 2:And that's more information for you too.
Speaker 3:That's it, yeah.
Speaker 2:You know you answered this a seven and then you said it's a seven because blah, blah, blah, blah blah. Why did you answer that way? Get it to expand on that. Now they can open up to 3000 characters. Now they can, because now you have something to talk about. Yeah, exactly That's very meaningful in their life.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yes, absolutely Good idea, yeah.
Speaker 2:So what I would do, too, on top of that, is make sure that you're collecting emails with this questionnaire.
Speaker 3:Okay.
Speaker 2:So you can use a landing page of some kind where you have to put your email in to be able to receive this questionnaire. A lot of companies that do that, like systemio, convert kit, mailchimp All those will help you do that.
Speaker 3:Okay.
Speaker 2:They'll help you with the landing page and then they'll help you collect the email emails. Right now I'm using system. It's a system with an eio And I'm building one right now on that one on that platform.
Speaker 3:Okay, okay.
Speaker 2:So, once you collect these emails because these are people that are going to be already invested in you because they're answering these questionnaires, so they're already investing information in you. They're trusting you already because with this information and then now you can email them back and start asking questions to our communication Make sure somewhere in there, like I talked about before, make sure you shake a hand for every person that gives the information. Thank you for the information. Yes.
Speaker 3:That kind of thing At first.
Speaker 2:it's probably best if you do it like in person, like you actually typing the email saying things Yeah, if it gets too overwhelming. You're going to have to put it into an automatic thing, yeah, and then, while you're small, like we are right now, shake as many hands as possible personally, and then, once you grow from that, then you might have to go into automation. I try to avoid automation if I can when it comes to shaking hands.
Speaker 3:Sure.
Speaker 2:But that'll give you that personal touch that you need to make contact with these people that have answered your questionnaire and give me all something to talk about.
Speaker 3:Okay, yeah, that's a great idea, okay, okay.
Speaker 2:Okay, the weekly inspirational quotes. That's going to get overwhelming for you. I can tell by the way you're talking about it and that kind of thing. It's something do you really want to do, but am I going to have the time to actually do that?
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:So I think I talked to you this before. The ones that I do are semi automated.
Speaker 3:Yes, yeah.
Speaker 2:So as much. when it comes to something like that, you want to automate that as much as possible. So they're the system that I started using it. Have you noticed lately that I've been posting a lot more frequently?
Speaker 3:I'm not on Twitter a lot. You mean on Twitter? right on Instagram. I've seen a lot.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's all of them, okay Twitter, my Instagram, my Facebook, my, my Tik Tok. I'm actually taking all of that and it's all been taken over by an AI.
Speaker 3:Wow, good for you.
Speaker 2:All I do is put in the content into the AI and it distributes it out to to all my platforms at the peakest time that I get that type of engagement. It's called pinnacle AI. It's $49 a month.
Speaker 3:Pinnacle AI.
Speaker 2:Yes, and I'll give you a link to it so you can see what what it is.
Speaker 3:Okay.
Speaker 2:So if you want to do that, you can actually use that for your guys as podcast. You can use that quotes, you can use that for pretty much anything that you want to go out to social media as consistently.
Speaker 3:Okay, yeah.
Speaker 2:But he just finished building it, so I was fortunate enough to be one of the beta users, so he's letting me use that. But from what I was under what I made to understand, it's something he's only at this particular point is only charging $49 a month for. Okay. Now he's thinking of raising enough to 200 here real soon.
Speaker 3:Geez So.
Speaker 2:I tried it. I wanted to try to get in on it as much as you can for the $49 a month deal.
Speaker 3:Yes, thank you, okay. Yeah, and I'll talk to Chris about it too, okay.
Speaker 2:And see what you guys think. If you have any more questions about it or how it works or anything like that, you go ahead and text me or whatever.
Speaker 3:We can talk about it.
Speaker 2:But I think if you're going to start posting these inspirational quotes, you're going to have to find a way to automate it So it doesn't take up a whole lot of times, because then you have to sit down and think about what the inspirational quote is. Where is it coming from? Who do I give the accolades to? Is this actually going to work for what I'm trying to do? Yeah, you know you think it's just going to be quotes, but it has to be. Quotes is something that's going to fit into what your niche is, what you're trying to accomplish. You can't talk about Henry Ford when you're talking about life coaching. It doesn't match, i mean there's parts of it that probably can, but I mean you should understand what I'm saying Right.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:So yeah, make just kind of think about that when you're doing that.
Speaker 3:Okay, no, that's a great idea, yeah.
Speaker 2:Where are you getting your life, your quotes from? I mean, have you had any ideas where to get them from?
Speaker 3:No, they were going to be from me. They were going to be my little bits of wisdom. So, yeah, I have to think about that, But yeah you know you have to be like a certain mood too. So why not, you know, record them when I'm in the certain mood but then schedule them for when I want them to go out? Like I said, you know, this weekend I didn't post because I really wasn't really in that frame of mind. Well, that's an immediate fail. It's a good thing, for lack of a better word.
Speaker 2:Well, so what will happen with it, with this is, it'll go through your quotes, but then it will recycle again. So it's a continuous kind of thing. Anyway, when you come up with a quote, make sure you Google it. So nobody else has said it.
Speaker 3:Yes.
Speaker 2:That happened a couple of times where I was like, oh, this is brilliant, I'll go. oh, he said it already. Oh, no way Yeah so like I really got lucky with my, with my tagline, because nobody else has said that.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:But you know that kind of thing. you just want to be cover your back when it comes to quotes like that, because if somebody else has said it, what you really wanted out there, you just got to make sure you give them credit for the quote. But if something that you said that nobody else has taken heck.
Speaker 3:go for it, people will love it Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure.
Speaker 2:Um, explain to me a little bit. I know this is kind of where we started, but I want I don't think we're flowing the way we are now. So explain to me more about your, your struggle with talking about spirituality or how that was working for you. Okay, I was more clear about that.
Speaker 3:I I've had some conversations with people where I've talked about, like my own, how spirituality helped me with my own healing journey And, um, you know, people just shut down because a lot of people think of spirituality in terms of religion And and I get that, which I totally get that, but I don't want, like I don't want to lose people when I start talking about spirituality. So I just like, over the last few months I've been sort of thinking, like mulling over my head, like how can I explain what I mean by spirituality without bringing to mind religion? one God, you know, with the, you know the white skin, the long flowing beard, and you know. So it just occurred to me about two weeks ago that what I'm really talking about isn't spirituality as much as it is just pure potential, like, do you believe that your situation can get better? Do you believe, um, and I don't like saying, do you believe in something greater than yourself, because that also trips people up. A lot of people don't want, you know, and I don't want to go there at all. All I want, oh God, guess what? that is The guy from India. Did you hear that phone call? No. He must know.
Speaker 2:He must know, you know.
Speaker 3:It's unbelievable, oh my God, he drives crazy. Anyway and um. So I think that I want people to, or no? what helped me was just thinking that My immediate physical circumstances aren't the only thing out there. There has to be a potential or an iteration of my life where this is solved, where this is behind me, where this has changed, you know, and it's just really about faith. But again, the word faith brings the religious connotation which I really want to leave out of my coaching. So I was just trying to explain that. I think that what I can do instead of talking about spirituality, is just about potential. Does this situation have the potential to get better than that's believing in something outside of your immediate physical realm, and that's really all I'm talking about.
Speaker 2:Okay that makes sense Okay so what you need to do right up front, when you get with somebody that you know you're going to be saying the word spiritual or possibly saying the word spiritual is setting the expectation of the call upfront. Okay, right up front, say this is not for spiritual or this is not, this is just potential. So you know I don't know exactly how you want to phrase that, i'll leave that up to you But setting the expectation of what you're going to do with your client upfront, it's going to be crucial, especially when it comes to coaching in faith.
Speaker 3:Yeah, so.
Speaker 2:And then, when you are coaching, be aware of the words that you do say or you're going to say and find different ways of saying it, like you saying potential instead of faith. I think that's good, more of that.
Speaker 3:I think that's good, yeah, exactly.
Speaker 2:Because that's not what you want, because that turns people off. There are two things, you two things, that you three things. Two things are three things you don't want to talk about.
Speaker 3:You don't want to talk about religion.
Speaker 2:You don't want to talk about taxes, yeah, yeah, and I learned that selling cars those are three things that you don't want to talk about when you're selling cars. So those are the things that you don't want to talk about when you're coaching, because they usually bring up negative feelings.
Speaker 3:Exactly, yeah, exactly, okay, perfect.
Speaker 2:Okay.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:So that about covers everything that I wanted to, that I wanted to actually touch base with you on. I'm going to give you just one more opportunity to before I go into one other thing. Is there anything else that you want to talk about? anything that you want to get off your chest or anything like that? anything, anything in your head that you want to talk about before I move on to my next thing?
Speaker 3:No, i really feel like I've I express myself very well this time. I mean this yeah, this call Yeah.
Speaker 2:All right, so I'm going to move you on to your next level of coaching.
Speaker 3:Okay.
Speaker 2:So here's now. You have a paid coach. You know coaching client congratulations. That's awesome. I'm really excited about that. Again, here's what I want you to do before our next session I want you to get five people to say no to you.
Speaker 3:Oh, I don't like that.
Speaker 2:Okay, I didn't like it either. one when Cliff Ravenscraft had me do the exact same thing And I, you know, and that's when I started getting actually getting into coaching was when I actually actively went out and got five people to say no. you know how many people actually said no to me? one. Oh and everybody else said yes.
Speaker 3:What Wait a second? How does that look at?
Speaker 2:take a look at that. That's not people saying yes to your this, people saying no to you. No, i don't want coaching from you.
Speaker 3:Right, i need to find five of those.
Speaker 2:Right, but that in turn will get people to you get frustrated when somebody says yes to you. We do coaching. We go to coaching to be yes, darn it. I mean good, you know I did, but that will actively that will actually be get you out there and talk to people and actively get people to say no to you. I mean, i'm not going to actively get people that want to coach with you because you're looking for that, no, but they're giving you yes instead. You want this is but you're actively looking for no.
Speaker 3:You see how that works. We are. Such people are so flawed We have to mess with our own brains. I should know you're right, it's total programming. Yeah, oh my God, okay, i don't like this task but because it's you, i'm going to try.
Speaker 2:Okay, you know, and just like I said before and if any other goal that I sent for you I'm not really looking for, you got to do this by this time. I'm looking for progress, i'm just looking for a movement forward. That's all I want. I want to see movement forward from what you're accomplishing. I don't want you to tell me how many knows you actually got.
Speaker 3:Oh.
Speaker 2:God, okay, but I'm expecting more yeses than no from you, to be honest with you.
Speaker 3:So let me like I haven't even gotten to the yes or the no. I'm still in like, oh my God, who am I going to ask? who you know? I'm still taking the step outside of my comfort zone. So I'm not Like I said. this is your next level.
Speaker 2:This is the next level that you need to accomplish to start actually doing what you've already accomplished. You've already accomplished this. I know You've already got one person not only to say yes to you, but say yes to you with their wallet.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah. So this is some. This should be easy for you. To be honest with you, this should be easy for you. You've already done Yes, you just need to do it with more people. That's the only difference. So now you need to actively find people. You know, whether it be in the Facebook group, that you were talking about friends, or friends of friends, or whatever. You know you're actively doing that so you could reach this goal that I've set for you.
Speaker 3:Okay, okay, all right, challenge accepted.
Speaker 2:Yes.
Speaker 3:God, yeah, you're lucky, you're cute.
Speaker 2:Oh, you go because I got my haircut.
Speaker 3:It's a game changer.
Speaker 2:It is.
Speaker 3:All right.
Speaker 2:All right. So, I would like, and I do this every time, but I just want to make sure I follow up with this and give me three things that really stood out to you And our conversation today.
Speaker 3:Oh my gosh. The first thing that popped into my mind which I didn't think was a takeaway, but apparently this is a pop into my mind was undercharging, Undercharging, Um Shoot, Um Shoot. What was it? I think answering the questionnaire for myself.
Speaker 2:Um No, why is that?
Speaker 3:Because I don't want to.
Speaker 2:No, that's good, That's very, very good, that goes into following your fear and getting out of your comfort zone.
Speaker 3:Exactly, and that's so, as where does that?
Speaker 2:sounds and counter two tips is that sounds to me as music to my ears, because you're going to. you're going to do something that you're uncomfortable doing, And even though you're fear it, you're going to do it, And that's. that's a big thing for me.
Speaker 3:So Exactly, no, no, no, exactly. I totally agree, um, and I guess, And well, firstly, you're like undying support for me is so overwhelming, but, as a takeaway, um, i think that, yes, my, the imposter syndrome is still lingering, so I need to be not that I thought I was out of it, but it's just good to to hear it from you as well that I really need to keep my eyes and my ears out for when it rears its you know head, because it's no friend of mine.
Speaker 2:There you go.
Speaker 3:Yeah, right. Good.
Speaker 2:So this is. This is now. I'm going to get off this. You're going to get off the phone call with me and do what? What's the first thing you're going to do?
Speaker 3:This question always trips me up.
Speaker 2:I know It kind of forces you to think about something that you really want to or need to do as soon as you get off the phone with me, and that's why I asked that question.
Speaker 3:Well, the first thing I have to do is go pick up my daughter.
Speaker 2:I'll do that. Yeah, I mean.
Speaker 3:I'll do that. It would be good. She would appreciate it. I'm sure I don't know why this is. I feel like going through those pictures of my photo shoot. Now, that's irrelevant. Maybe a little bit Is it or is it?
Speaker 2:I mean, think about it for a second. This is a photo shoot. That's your first time doing anything like that. These are going to be the first things that people want to see. Maybe you should take a look at them again and just make you know and kind of experience them a little bit more. At first glance I may not look that great, but what are they really?
Speaker 3:Yeah, exactly That's I think. yeah, it's knowing at me a little bit, because I didn't look at them that carefully yesterday, Just on my phone. I haven't looked at them like on my computer and stuff like that. So and I think that there's something in there like the fact that I don't like them is trying to tell me something. So it's not about the pictures as much, as why is it hard for me to see myself in that light?
Speaker 2:There you go, perfect. Oh, proud, proud, proud. That is fantastic, oh, that is so great. Thank you.
Speaker 3:All right.
Speaker 2:I'm going to stop recording, but I still want to talk to you. Thank you for listening to the coaching edition of the Undiscovered Entrepreneur Brought to you by Doing It Today Coaching. If you want to get across the start line, contact me, dj Scoob, at Doing It Today Coaching at gmailcom. Say the words, do it now for a free two-hour discovery call to see how I can help you in your entrepreneur adventure. Art and Graphics by Elaine Wilson, supported by my Patreon, brian Briggs of OceanTree Creative and Oliver Siegel of Anall, and hosted by me, dj Scoob. Click the show notes below for more information. And remember I can, i am, i will and I'm doing it today.
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